The Return of the Professional (LVZ)
Feb 17, 2022 23:50:43 GMT -5
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Post by leonvanzandt on Feb 17, 2022 23:50:43 GMT -5
“And so, I return once again, Northern Pro Wrestling.”
The familiar Flemish brogue can only mean one thing.
Cold open.
We’re once again in that familiar homemade gym; sparse, almost minimalist. The combination of classical strings and rapid techno beats that is Venetian Snares can be heard in the background. The most distinguishing characteristic is not the equipment that fills it, but rather what ISN’T in there. There are no benches, no bulky dumbbells or barbells or plates. No medicine balls, either. Hardly a gym you would associate with one of the most athletic men you’ve ever met. Instead, there are a few small clubs. What appears to be a pair of maxes of different sizes. And the occasional kettlebell. There are several thick mats, clearly meant to absorb heavy impact. And of course, this man.
“I have waited for this moment for some time now.”
Leon Van Zandt says hello. Smiling, staring, and aimlessly tapping a hand on what appears to be a life-sized dummy, designed to withstand the impact of contact sports training.
And of course, the contact sport that unifies us today.
“I won’t bore you with the details, but I am pleased to make my return to the company that helped establish my name in North America, and I fully intend to make this new run count. The Continental Wrestling Alliance is a new landscape, with new realms and familiar places alike, and it is a new environment for me to test my skills against the best of the best.”
A nod, as his smile widens.
“Which leads me to my opponent for next Wednesday night; Kaupena Yoon. A most brutal, high-impact fighter from Hawaii. I know it is a common stereotype that pro wrestlers from Polynesia are vicious, if undisciplined by nature, but from what I have seen of Yoon, his brutality has nothing to do with his origins, and everything to do with the fact that his skills have been constantly honed for the squared circle, and he is disciplined to fight as hard as he can.
“Which is exactly the kind of battle I sought on my big return. A force of disciplined impact, to face my own style of old world catch grappling. Not quite as dynamic, but more than enough to stop a man in his tracks. And I have quite a few ways to withstand and counterattack a whirling dervish of aggression and power such as Yoon.”
Van Zandt taps his knuckles on his present companion.
“A fine model to practice on. Quality workmanship here. And with just enough weight to provide resistance whenever I try to suplex it or lock a nasty hold on it. Not quite a perfect replication of a human opponent, but fine enough. I expect I will not have as easy a time suplexing Meneer (writer’s note: “Meneer” is an honorific/title in Dutch, similar to “Mister” or “Sir”) Yoon or locking in my Sugar Hold on him as I do on this thing, but nothing that is ever worth that struggle is easy. And what is this all worth, you ask?
“It is worth showing the fans of Northern ProWrestling, and this brave new world of the CWA that Leon Van Zandt has returned to his path to greatness, and that he is ready for the new challenges awaiting him, be they Jesse Jamester, Ronnie Long, or whoever will step inside that ring against me. I cannot gloat of guaranteed victory, for sure, but I can say with confidence they have never wrestled the likes of me, and that they will not know what to expect.”
Leon rises to his feet, his frame glistening in sweat.
“If they want to remember just what I can do, they can watch Wednesday night, as I give EVERYTHING to the fight with Meneer Yoon. It will be the first of many great battles, and the first of many great victories.”
The camera closes in on his grinning face.
“I’m back. And I’m not going anywhere.”
Cut.
The familiar Flemish brogue can only mean one thing.
Cold open.
We’re once again in that familiar homemade gym; sparse, almost minimalist. The combination of classical strings and rapid techno beats that is Venetian Snares can be heard in the background. The most distinguishing characteristic is not the equipment that fills it, but rather what ISN’T in there. There are no benches, no bulky dumbbells or barbells or plates. No medicine balls, either. Hardly a gym you would associate with one of the most athletic men you’ve ever met. Instead, there are a few small clubs. What appears to be a pair of maxes of different sizes. And the occasional kettlebell. There are several thick mats, clearly meant to absorb heavy impact. And of course, this man.
“I have waited for this moment for some time now.”
Leon Van Zandt says hello. Smiling, staring, and aimlessly tapping a hand on what appears to be a life-sized dummy, designed to withstand the impact of contact sports training.
And of course, the contact sport that unifies us today.
“I won’t bore you with the details, but I am pleased to make my return to the company that helped establish my name in North America, and I fully intend to make this new run count. The Continental Wrestling Alliance is a new landscape, with new realms and familiar places alike, and it is a new environment for me to test my skills against the best of the best.”
A nod, as his smile widens.
“Which leads me to my opponent for next Wednesday night; Kaupena Yoon. A most brutal, high-impact fighter from Hawaii. I know it is a common stereotype that pro wrestlers from Polynesia are vicious, if undisciplined by nature, but from what I have seen of Yoon, his brutality has nothing to do with his origins, and everything to do with the fact that his skills have been constantly honed for the squared circle, and he is disciplined to fight as hard as he can.
“Which is exactly the kind of battle I sought on my big return. A force of disciplined impact, to face my own style of old world catch grappling. Not quite as dynamic, but more than enough to stop a man in his tracks. And I have quite a few ways to withstand and counterattack a whirling dervish of aggression and power such as Yoon.”
Van Zandt taps his knuckles on his present companion.
“A fine model to practice on. Quality workmanship here. And with just enough weight to provide resistance whenever I try to suplex it or lock a nasty hold on it. Not quite a perfect replication of a human opponent, but fine enough. I expect I will not have as easy a time suplexing Meneer (writer’s note: “Meneer” is an honorific/title in Dutch, similar to “Mister” or “Sir”) Yoon or locking in my Sugar Hold on him as I do on this thing, but nothing that is ever worth that struggle is easy. And what is this all worth, you ask?
“It is worth showing the fans of Northern ProWrestling, and this brave new world of the CWA that Leon Van Zandt has returned to his path to greatness, and that he is ready for the new challenges awaiting him, be they Jesse Jamester, Ronnie Long, or whoever will step inside that ring against me. I cannot gloat of guaranteed victory, for sure, but I can say with confidence they have never wrestled the likes of me, and that they will not know what to expect.”
Leon rises to his feet, his frame glistening in sweat.
“If they want to remember just what I can do, they can watch Wednesday night, as I give EVERYTHING to the fight with Meneer Yoon. It will be the first of many great battles, and the first of many great victories.”
The camera closes in on his grinning face.
“I’m back. And I’m not going anywhere.”
Cut.
