October 7 | Marsupials of Mayhem vs the Bastards | Kid Koala
Sept 28, 2021 21:26:31 GMT -5
BRAVE1, theshootfighter1963, and 1 more like this
Post by Marsupials of Mayhem on Sept 28, 2021 21:26:31 GMT -5
The camera fades on an expensive office.
Teak woodwork. Fancy books. Paintings by artists who died long ago.
A winged leather armchair occupied by a grey haired man, with spectacles upon the end of his nose. His suit is immaculate. One leg crossed over the other, nursing a writing pad and fancy pen armed ready to notate.
In the matching leather chaise lounges a man NPW fans have come to know as Kid Koala. He wears the t-shirt Draymond Green “Fuck it, die then” cartoon syringe t-shirt, but there’s a maple leaf drawn over the syringe’s face in red Sharpie.
KID KOALA:
“I gotta take us back to the start, doc.”
The “doc” implies for Kid Koala to proceed, without noise or gesture.
KID KOALA:
“There was a finite place. In a finite time. And inexhaustibly it was too much. A singularity which, of itself, was too much for its own existence.
“And it was hot.
“It was SO - FUCKING - HOT!”
Confusion seems to wash over the “doc”’s face. But he allows it to continue.
KID KOALA:
“And out of nowhere… the extrapolation of singularity became too much and it required fluctuation and expansion.
“Multiplication really, doc.”
He sits on the edge of the leather chaise, head in his hands before sitting up as more thoughts strike him.
KID KOALA:
“I mean, in spite of, or despite, however you want… we didn’t have the capacity or density needed to form the required black hole.
“That singularity which we came to existence from within became existence on a WHOOOLLLLE other level.
“I mean, seriously, a whole other level. And we could never achieve singularity again.
“Ever.”
Using his pen as a means of gaining Kid Koala’s attention, the “doc” cleared his throat.
DOC:
“Uh… Kid Koala… are you referring to Big Bang Theory?”
Confused, KK stands from his seated position.
KID KOALA:
“Big Bang. Marsupials of Mayhem. Relativity. Relevance.
“It’s all inter-fucking-related, doc.
“Once upon a time I was singular. And that singularity imposed irregularity. And that irregularity created a intense, slow-burning heat.
“But you see, doc… the way this all ties in together is simply for the Marsupials of Mayhem to exist there had to be multiplication. A bang. There had to be irregularity to create regularity.
“I’m the fucking irregularity.
“I - AM - THE BANG!”
Breathing out a deep thought, the doc begins to speak but Kid Koala never lets him.
KID KOALA:
“Let me put it in more simply…
“For the Marsupials of Mayhem to exist, as a multiplication, we had to first learn that we could NEVER co-exist as a singularity.
“And once that singularity determines it will never have the capacity to achieve singularity we expanded together.
“And to expand together we need to grow within our universe.
“So we made our own universe.”
He sits heavily into the chaise, swinging his legs around and pulling a rolled cigarette from his pocket.
KID KOALA:
“I mean, a lot has been said of me on this planet, doc.
“Lots.
“I’ve heard it all.
“But Rob Riot hit the nail right on the head. Driven it in with force, precision and if I do say so myself… benevolence.
“I was born too early.”
The doctor’s face is awash with total confusion.
KID KOALA:
“I once stood inside a backyard wrestling ring and I was small, weak and scared. But I knew that I wanted to be there.
“I was tossed around and broken and bloodied.
“But I kept getting up. I kept fighting. I kept getting hotter.
“And hotter.
“And BANG!
“One day the intensity of all that heat extrapolated the man here on your expensive leather couch explaining the relativity between Big Bang and the existence of the Marsupials of Mayhem.”
He sits on the edge again, pulling a lighter from his pocket. He’s lit it before the doctor can protest.
KID KOALA:
“CWA… NPW… XHF… it doesn’t fucking matter what universe we exist within because our relativity is subjective and objective to the immovable objects that are trying to occupy our space with their own singularity.
“The Bastards. Their narrow mindedness wants to explain our existence with the simplicity of the pouch which we ALL come from?
“That we were born too early. And we require to enable ourselves by suckling from the mother’s teat.
“But what Rob Riot doesn’t understand is that we never really ever stop suckling from the teat.
“We always crave that sustenance for something to feed us.”
He lays down in the chaise, drawing from the cigarette.
KID KOALA:
“And if I need to feed the Bastard then so be it. I will flop the proverbial tit and let them feed.
“When I birthed the Marsupials of Mayhem we all needed something. Outside of each other we needed to become something.
“The extrapolation of our singularity to become a multitude populated our relevance and it’s a gift I will forever be indebted to.
“And our existence as togetherness feeds what we are.
“And to pay back that debt we simply give back.
“Give others that relevance.
“Feed others the sustenance we’ve accepted as a group instead of crying over our inability to have the capacity to achieve singularity.
“We have accepted that as a group with have achieved individuality.
“Something the Bastards will never achieve.”
He looks at the burning ember of his “cigarette”.
KID KOALA:
“And as simplicity has it… when the Bastards come up against the Marsupials of Mayhem we share our gift.
“The relevance we granted one another we will give to them.
“In order for them to experience their own Big Bang…
“We need to give them an explosion.
“And we WILL explode.”
He flicks the cigarette at the curtains, much to the chagrin of the doctor who rises to stomp it out.
KID KOALA:
“I hope they want relevance, doc. I hope they want to die with me.”
</Fade to Black.>
Teak woodwork. Fancy books. Paintings by artists who died long ago.
A winged leather armchair occupied by a grey haired man, with spectacles upon the end of his nose. His suit is immaculate. One leg crossed over the other, nursing a writing pad and fancy pen armed ready to notate.
In the matching leather chaise lounges a man NPW fans have come to know as Kid Koala. He wears the t-shirt Draymond Green “Fuck it, die then” cartoon syringe t-shirt, but there’s a maple leaf drawn over the syringe’s face in red Sharpie.
KID KOALA:
“I gotta take us back to the start, doc.”
The “doc” implies for Kid Koala to proceed, without noise or gesture.
KID KOALA:
“There was a finite place. In a finite time. And inexhaustibly it was too much. A singularity which, of itself, was too much for its own existence.
“And it was hot.
“It was SO - FUCKING - HOT!”
Confusion seems to wash over the “doc”’s face. But he allows it to continue.
KID KOALA:
“And out of nowhere… the extrapolation of singularity became too much and it required fluctuation and expansion.
“Multiplication really, doc.”
He sits on the edge of the leather chaise, head in his hands before sitting up as more thoughts strike him.
KID KOALA:
“I mean, in spite of, or despite, however you want… we didn’t have the capacity or density needed to form the required black hole.
“That singularity which we came to existence from within became existence on a WHOOOLLLLE other level.
“I mean, seriously, a whole other level. And we could never achieve singularity again.
“Ever.”
Using his pen as a means of gaining Kid Koala’s attention, the “doc” cleared his throat.
DOC:
“Uh… Kid Koala… are you referring to Big Bang Theory?”
Confused, KK stands from his seated position.
KID KOALA:
“Big Bang. Marsupials of Mayhem. Relativity. Relevance.
“It’s all inter-fucking-related, doc.
“Once upon a time I was singular. And that singularity imposed irregularity. And that irregularity created a intense, slow-burning heat.
“But you see, doc… the way this all ties in together is simply for the Marsupials of Mayhem to exist there had to be multiplication. A bang. There had to be irregularity to create regularity.
“I’m the fucking irregularity.
“I - AM - THE BANG!”
Breathing out a deep thought, the doc begins to speak but Kid Koala never lets him.
KID KOALA:
“Let me put it in more simply…
“For the Marsupials of Mayhem to exist, as a multiplication, we had to first learn that we could NEVER co-exist as a singularity.
“And once that singularity determines it will never have the capacity to achieve singularity we expanded together.
“And to expand together we need to grow within our universe.
“So we made our own universe.”
He sits heavily into the chaise, swinging his legs around and pulling a rolled cigarette from his pocket.
KID KOALA:
“I mean, a lot has been said of me on this planet, doc.
“Lots.
“I’ve heard it all.
“But Rob Riot hit the nail right on the head. Driven it in with force, precision and if I do say so myself… benevolence.
“I was born too early.”
The doctor’s face is awash with total confusion.
KID KOALA:
“I once stood inside a backyard wrestling ring and I was small, weak and scared. But I knew that I wanted to be there.
“I was tossed around and broken and bloodied.
“But I kept getting up. I kept fighting. I kept getting hotter.
“And hotter.
“And BANG!
“One day the intensity of all that heat extrapolated the man here on your expensive leather couch explaining the relativity between Big Bang and the existence of the Marsupials of Mayhem.”
He sits on the edge again, pulling a lighter from his pocket. He’s lit it before the doctor can protest.
KID KOALA:
“CWA… NPW… XHF… it doesn’t fucking matter what universe we exist within because our relativity is subjective and objective to the immovable objects that are trying to occupy our space with their own singularity.
“The Bastards. Their narrow mindedness wants to explain our existence with the simplicity of the pouch which we ALL come from?
“That we were born too early. And we require to enable ourselves by suckling from the mother’s teat.
“But what Rob Riot doesn’t understand is that we never really ever stop suckling from the teat.
“We always crave that sustenance for something to feed us.”
He lays down in the chaise, drawing from the cigarette.
KID KOALA:
“And if I need to feed the Bastard then so be it. I will flop the proverbial tit and let them feed.
“When I birthed the Marsupials of Mayhem we all needed something. Outside of each other we needed to become something.
“The extrapolation of our singularity to become a multitude populated our relevance and it’s a gift I will forever be indebted to.
“And our existence as togetherness feeds what we are.
“And to pay back that debt we simply give back.
“Give others that relevance.
“Feed others the sustenance we’ve accepted as a group instead of crying over our inability to have the capacity to achieve singularity.
“We have accepted that as a group with have achieved individuality.
“Something the Bastards will never achieve.”
He looks at the burning ember of his “cigarette”.
KID KOALA:
“And as simplicity has it… when the Bastards come up against the Marsupials of Mayhem we share our gift.
“The relevance we granted one another we will give to them.
“In order for them to experience their own Big Bang…
“We need to give them an explosion.
“And we WILL explode.”
He flicks the cigarette at the curtains, much to the chagrin of the doctor who rises to stomp it out.
KID KOALA:
“I hope they want relevance, doc. I hope they want to die with me.”
</Fade to Black.>
