Post by MongotheDestroyer on Sept 5, 2021 21:18:42 GMT -5
[The scene opens up to show a jam packed Dandenong Basketball Stadium in Melbourne Australia, the fans are going wild as "Get Free" by the Vines hits and the 'Tron lights up with the No Mans Land banner.
The shot then crosses to ring announcer Frank Salazar, in the ring.]
Frank Salazar : WELCOME TO NO MANS LAND!!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Thanks Frankie, and boy, what a show have we got in store for you all tonight fans.
Toby Navel : Thats right Jerry, this week we not only have two qualifying matches for the vacant Statewide title, but also the Semi Final's of the number one contenders tourney.
Jeremy Tucker : Sam Piltdown has been watching this tournament closely so far, and must be getting nervous about meeting the winner, there is some top competition here in Australia, and any of these four guys are well deserving of a title shot.
Toby Navel : That they are Jerry, and speaking of Sam Piltdown, last week he promised us a very special guest for his segment on this weeks show, i have been investigating all week, and haven't been able to come up with anything, i guess we will just have to wait and see who has arrived down here in Aus.
Jeremy Tucker : Yeah, i haven't heard anything either Toby, its been kept top secret, although im sure, like always Fulton, that you will claim to know what nobody else does, and then refuse to cough up the info.
Andrew Fulton : How'd you know Jerry?
Toby Navel : Typical, you know Fulton, i don't believe a word you say, you are ... how do they say it ... "Full of it!"
Andrew Fulton : So was a very special lady a bit earlier on, chock a block full of it!
Jeremy Tucker : Special lady? Do tell Fulton, is that wedding bells i hear ringing?
Andrew Fulton : Well, i wasn't feeling very well this morning, and to tell you girls the truth, i didn't think i was going to make it in for the show, so i rang up Mr Soutter to call in sick.
Toby Navel : And you chickened out, god, he sure has you wrapped around his little finger Fulton.
Andrew Fulton : Actually, he gave me some advice, he told me when he isn't feeling to well, like i wasn't, that he goes to see his wife, and she makes him feel a whole lot better.
Jeremy Tucker : So ...
Andrew Fulton : And i have never felt better in my life, that women can do wonders!
Toby Navel : YOU DID WHAT?
Jeremy Tucker : Ummm, i don't think that is what he had in mind Fulton.
Toby Navel : Your dead!
A spot light shines on a phone booth standing in the middle of the entranceway. Smoke starts to fill the phone booth as Headstrong by Trapt starts playing. When the chorus hits blue pryo falls from the ceiling onto the phone booth. Red pryo blasts from where the phone booth was. When the Smoke dissipates the phone booth is destroyed. This Just got Nasty Rolls across the Aussie-Tron. As the Crowd realizes who it is they all start to cheer.
Crowd- Ned Ned Ned Ned
The Spotlight now pans to the top of the Aussie-Tron where a man stands starring down (insert Oppenet) with his arms crossed. The Crowd just goes nuts for everyones favorite crime fighting wrestler. The man walks off the Aussie-tron to thats right nothing he is floating in the air. The man starts moving closer to the ring. As he gets closer to the ring the lights turn back on to reveal Ned Chambers floating along to the ring.]
Frank Salazar : LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE FOLLOWING MATCH IS THE FIRST FOR THE EVENING, WITH THE WINNER ADVANCING TO COMPETE FOR THE VACANT STATEWIDE TITLE, INTRODUCING FIRST, IN THE RING TO MY LEFT, HAILING FROM MASON CITY, IOWA, AND COMING IN AT 6'11 & 325 LBS.... NASTY NED CHAMBERS!!!!! - aND INTRODUCING HIS OPPONENT, HAILING FROM HAWAII AND COMING IN AT 487LBS, KOTA!!!!!
[The lights dim slowly, an image of a beautiful Island paradise shows on the screen..then it cuts to a raging volcano..hot lava flowing through a village..burning up everything in its path...the picture turns to rubble and bodies in a ruined village..then Kota appears on the screen, he is in the ring..bodysplashing a helpless opponent. Kota walks slowly to the ring and turns and looks back at the screen..nodding in approval as he slowly gets on the apron, testing out the ropes.]
Jeremy Tucker : Big match to kick things of tonight folks, with the winner of this advancing to compete for the Statewide title next show.
Andrew Fulton : Yes, we know Jerry, Frank just said the exact same thing less then one minute ago, you really do think these fans out there are stupid, dont you?
Jeremy Tucker : Kota enters the ring and he and Ned circle each other, these are two huge men in there, and know i dont think that about ther fans, just going over it for anyone who missed the introduction is all Fulton.
Andrew Fulton : What happened to our current Statewide champion anyway? Where is Adrian Tanner, and why the hell has he been stripped of the title?
[Ned and Kota both exchange big rights and lefts.]
Toby Navel : I dont think they have been able to get in contact with Tanner, and so have decided to strip him of the title.
Jeremy Tucker : These two huge men are jsut litterally beating the living daylights out of each other, and this one has jsut gotten under way, any one of them punches would put a normal man out right away, but these two are taking it and giving it right back.
[Both men hook up, and Kota throws Ned into the ropes, and Ned charges at Kota, but just bounces of off him.]
Andrew Fulton : This Kota guy is bloody huge, where did we find him? He is even bigger then Soutter!
[Ned back to his feet, and both men lock up again, Ned throwing kota into the ropes, Kota coming in to meet Nasty Ned Chambers, but he catches him with a tilt a whirl slam.]
Andrew Fulton : God damn, how did he get the big guy up in that?
Toby Navel : Power Fulton, ned is a powerhouse, plus he used his momentum.
[Kota stands up. Nasty Ned Chambers clotheslines Kota. Kota grabs Nasty Ned Chambers's head and DDT's him on the mat.]
Jeremy Tucker : Kota now getting in control here, that was a beautiful DDT from the big man, now is where he should be using all of that weight to put Ned away.
[Kota puts Nasty Ned Chambers in an arm grapevine submission.]
Toby Navel : The big guy not taking your advice Jerry, instead looks like he wants to wear out Ned.
Andrew Fulton : He's wearing me out, thats for sure, much more of this and i'll be drifting off.
Jeremy Tucker : Give it a rest Fulton, these two are giving it a good go, you cant blame Kota if he wants to go for a rest hold or two, look at the guy, he is sucking up air like he has just ran a marathon.
[Ref Tsalazidis asks Ned if he will submit, but Ned refuses, and Kota breaks the hold.]
Toby Navel : Kota picks Ned up by the throat and lifts him in the air, looks like he is going for a chokeslam here.
Jeremy Tucker : No! Ned countered it, hooking Kota and drilling his head into the mat with a big time ddt.
Toby Navel : Ned looks like he may of pulled this one off against the rookie Kota, and he is setting him up for a big powerbomb, can he get him up?
Andrew Fulton : No chance, Ned is no where near strong enough to get him up, kota is almost 500 pounds!
[Ned tries to lift Kota up for the powerbomb, but Kota is just too big and he flips him over in a back body drop.]
Toby Navel : Nasty Ned Chambers climbs to his feet, and Kota tosses him into the turnbuckle, sets himself, and charges, launching himself at Ned, and connecting with the Kota splash!
Andrew Fulton : He just moved the whole ring a good foot there!
Jeremy Tucker : Ned stumbles out of the corner, and Kota scoops him and splatters his ass all over the ring with a huge sit down piledriver!
Toby Navel : The Richter Scale!!! Kota with the cover.
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 ............ 2 ..................... 3!!!!
Toby Navel : Kota has done it, he has won this match.
Jeremy Tucker : Congrats to Kota on his debut win, he now moves on to meet the winner of Vulcan and Boof next week, lets take it to the back.
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Jun 05, 2004#2
[Cut to backstage, where we see CWA interviewer Fifi practically bursting from her bikini top. Beside her, sitting on an upside down garbage can and holding a steel brush is Handy Andy.]
Fifi - Fans, i'm joined back here tonight by Handy Andy. Andy, how are you finding your time here in SWAT?
Handy Andy - Well, Fifi, to tell you the truth, its not what i thought it would be. I had heard so much about all of these great stars that compete down here in Australia, and frankly, i haven't seen much to impress me.
Fifi - Well, last week, you sure were impressive against Nasty Ned, and this week, you are meeting Lonewolf McNeely, the winner going onto the final next week, and one step closer to Sam Piltdown and his Australian Heavyweight title.
Handy Andy - Wouldn't that make for a great story. Handy Andy, comes from no where, total obscurity to not only win the tournament, but then bring the title home, ohh yeah, thats the stuff that dreams are made of, but lets not get too ahead off ourselves.
One week at a time.
Keep a lid on it.
Your only as good as your last match.
All of them cliches, you know, they didn't become household sayings for nothing, and i may not be a household name just yet, but to quote another household saying.
Baby steps.
Fifi - So, tell us. How do you think you will fare tonight against Lonewolf?
Handy Andy - I will account for Lonewolf, don't you fret about that Lassie. He was lucky to get by Vulcan last week, and if that big masked dude was some sort of allie of his, well, i'm telling you right now, he best not get involved in my business, because i will be more then happy to drop him as well as McNeely, rip his mask off, exposing him to these great Aussie fans down here in Dandenong, and walk right past the pair of them onto the final.
Fifi - You sure do seem confident for someone in only his second match ever.
Handy Andy - Listen Lassie, if your not confident, if you don't think you can hang with the big boys, and don't want to aim for the highest, then you have no right even being in this business. Not going up against the big names of Sam Piltdown & Adam Seven, heck, if you don't have confidence in yourself, you don't even belong in there against the small fish like Lonewolf and Jinn.
Fifi - Small fish?
Handy Andy - You know it. I would love nothing more then go out there with this brush and garbage can, and do what i do best, but apparently these Aussie's are quicker to DQ you then they are to finish up in the bedroom.
Fifi - Word has it you are pretty Handy in the bedroom.
[Flutters her eyes at Handy Andy.]
Handy Andy - Handy by name, Handy by nature, be that the bedroom, the wrestling ring, or anywhere else.
Fifi - Well, there you have it guys
Handy Andy - Hold it lassie. Before we go, like i was saying earlier, these damn Aussie are so quick to DQ a man, well, i want to make this final special, i want it to mean something, so once i have finished with Lonewolf
Ha, thats a good one, isn't it.
The guy calls himself Lonewolf, yet he has this Rain bird fawning all over him, he has some masked guy winning his matches for him, and i even saw a tape of him in some strip club, with about ten guys, my friend, you are no Lonewolf, you are not even a wrestler, what you are is a joke!
A joke that Handy Andy will be more then happy to clean up.
Now, as i was saying, once i am finished with Lonewolf and his minions, well, i want the winner of the Seven / Jinn match in my kind of match. A good old fashioned Hardcore Match!
[Smashes the steel brush against the side of the bin making a big bang.]
THATS RIGHT!
I want to liven stuff up down here! I'm talking everything goes, no dq's, falls count anywhere, whatever it takes!
Fifi - Thanks for that Andy, and good luck, back to you guys.
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Jun 05, 2004#3
Jeremy Tucker- Ladies and gentlemen, lets go to Frank Salazar for the introductions on our next match up.
Frank Salazar- This match is a one fall encounter. Introducing first, in the ring already, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Parts Unknown, Boof!!!
[Theres a very mild pop for Boof]
Frank Salazar- And his opponent, weighing in at 297 pounds, hailing from an unknown location, Vulcan!!! (crowd boos ***)
Andrew Fulton- Why do people keep their hometowns a secret? Like they think someones going to come hunt them down at their front door or something.
[The lights dim slowly, followed by a somber red light illuminating the ring. Fire appears on the video screen as screams of unearthly things sound throughout the arena. "SlutGarden" by Marilyn Manson begins to play as Vulcan walks from behind the curtain. He stands on the ramp for a moment.]
Toby Navel- You never know these days Fulton .. Planes fly into buildings, war seemingly everywhere Yeah you never know just who might want to come find you.
[The red light reflects off Vulcans head as he slowly walks to the ring. He gets halfway down to the ring before he stops and removes his coat.]
Andrew Fulton- Well when you put it like that, I suppose I should start hailing from parts unknown as well
[Vulcan still stares at the ring, almost looking through it as he continues down the ramp. He walks up the steps and then along the apron until he's in the middle of the ropes on the outside.]
Toby Navel- With all the friends youve . Umm, not made, I defiantly suggest you relocate there .
[Vulcan faces the crowd and gives them a twisted smile as he steps between the middle and top rope. He then stands, watching the crowd react without even a hint of emotion.]
Andrew Fulton- What are you talking about Navel, I happen to have an over abundance of friends
Toby Navel- Keep telling yourself that
Jeremy Tucker- Now, now kids. This match is almost ready to begin.
[Boof checks out the ring. He bounces off the ropes a few times. Then turns to the referee Nick Tsalazidis, and asks him to check Vulcan's boots and knee pads.]
Andrew Fulton- If I were Vulcan, Id take offense to that. Check my boots, ugh no check his boots. This guy Boofs like the class tattle tale. Telling the ref to check Vulcans gear, give me a break.
Jeremy Tucker- Come on Fulton, would you really want to take the chance that your opponent was packing something in a kneepad if you were out there wrestling?
Andrew Fulton- Vulcan has no need for that kind of thing, has a bit too much class to even bother with it.
[ring, ring, ring]
Jeremy Tucker- Theres the bell, and were under way fans.
Toby Navel- This should be a good one.
[Boof runs across the ring, and immediately shoulder tackles Vulcan. Vulcan climbs back to his feet, and grabs Boof throwing him off the ropes and connecting with a powerful clothesline.]
Andrew Fulton- See, Boof shouldve never tried to snitch on Vulcan to the ref. Now Vulcans out to hurt someone.
Jeremy Tucker- I think Vulcans out for a win, especially now that we know the winner of this match gets to face Kota for the Statewide Championship.
Andrew Fulton- Snitches get stitches Tucker, and I think enforcing that motto is a little more important than a title shot.
[Boof struggles back to his feet. And Vulcan just kicks him in the head. Vulcan drops for a pin.]
Nick Tsalazidis- 1
[Boof kicks out. ]
Toby Navel - A little early for a pin attempt. Especially with an opponent like Boof.
Jeremy Tucker: Yeah, Vulcan was probably a bit premature with that pin attempt. Needs to wear Boof down a bit more than that.
Andrew Fulton- Cant fault the man for trying to end this one quickly, its not like hes being paid by the hour.
[Boof stands up. Boof attempts a waistlock suplex, but he doesnt have the power to lift Vulcan.]
Jeremy Tucker - This ones moving fast, but its turning into an outstanding match.
[Finally giving up on the suplex, Boof runs and tackles Vulcan. He then mounts Vulcan and begins to punch him in the head.]
Andrew Fulton- I thought closed fists were illegal?
[Vulcan manages to get out from under Boof, but Boof hits Vulcan an elbow drop as Vulcan tries to get back to his feet. Boof then lifts Vulcan, who nails him with a straight shot to the face for his troubles.]
Toby Navel: Thats one way to turn the tempo
Jeremy Tucker: Not exactly the most fair way, but it got the job done I suppose.
Andrew Fulton: Who ever told you life was going to be fair, Tucker?
[Boof gets thrown into the corner. Vulcan comes over and begins smashing Boof's head into the turnbuckles. Vulcan the whips Boof out of the corner and off the far side ropes meeting him with a big clothesline. Vulcan then comes in and begins to lay the boots to Boof, but Boof reaches up and grabs Vulcans trunks, then rolls over hurling Vulcan out of the ring.]
Andrew Fulton- Im defiantly not a fan, but that was smart thinking on behalf of Boof.
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1) ]
Toby Navel - Looks like the action is going to move outside now.
[Boof rolls out to the floor, but is met with a swift kick to the head once he gets there. (..2)]
Jeremy Tucker- Hard shot to the head from Vulcan, but Boof keeps approaching. Hes determined to get the upper hand.
[Vulcan delivers a kick to the head of Boof, which finally staggers him ( 3). Vulcan punches away on Boof. (....4) Vulcan gets hit with a back heel kick. (.....5) The two men fight into the aisle.]
Toby Navel- These two better not go too far, theyre already on the 5 count.
Boof and Vulcan move back to ringside. Boof throws Vulcan into the ring, they lockup. Boof sends Vulcan to the corner of the ring and comes from behind with a bulldog on Vulcan. Boof stands over Vulcan as he struggles back up to his feet.]
Andrew Fulton- I cant believe Boof has managed this kind of offense on Vulcan, I figure this one would be lopsided like a motherfu
Jeremy Tucker- Watch your mouth Fulton Just because were not in America doesnt mean you can start dropping the F-bomb on television.
Andrew Fulton- Piltown does it .
Toby Navel- And he gets fined for it to
Andrew Fulton- Ugh .
[Boof tries for a spinning backbreaker but is unable hit it. He follows that with a front slam, and then sends Vulcan to the outside again.]
Jeremy Tucker- Back to the floor
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1) Boof hits a reverse crucifix powerbomb on Vulcan.(..2) ]
Toby Navel - Boof is in firm control at this point of the match.
Jeremy Tucker - These two have fought all over the ringside area tonight, in and out of the ring, on the floor, about the only place they havent been is on our table.
Andrew Fulton- Yet .
[Boof nails Vulcan with a springboard dropkick. Boof climbs to his feet. (...3) ]
Jeremy Tucker - Yeah, lets hope they forget were over here.
[(....4) Vulcan takes the advantage by whipping Boof into the guard rail.(.....5) Vulcan continues to bounce Boofs head off the rail, then he throws Boof back into the ring. Vulcan delivers a knee to the midsection of Boof, which sends Boof to the mat. Boof struggles to climb to his feet as he finally manages to get to his feet, Vulcan runs to the ropes, but Boof catches him with a huge boot, right to the mush! ]
Jeremy Tucker - Nice boot by Boof.
Toby Navel- Holy Jesus, that was a brutal shot.
[Boof puts Vulcan in the cobra clutch. Nick Tsalazidis asks Vulcan if he quits. ... (AHHHH!) ... ... ... ]
Jeremy Tucker- Cobra clutch from Boof . And Vulcans howling out in pain.
Andrew Fulton- Thats not pain you imbecile. Vulcans just letting us know hes about to make his move.
[Boof breaks the hold, and punches Vulcan repeatedly. Boof throws Vulcan into the ropes, and then mounts him with the Lou Thesz Press. Boof pulls Vulcan to his feet, but is met with a low knee as Vulcan gets to his feet.]
Jeremy Tucker- COME ON REF, THAT WAS LOW~!!!
Andrew Fulton- Come on nothing, that was smart. Youve been applauding Boof the whole match when hes being doing nothing but cheap moves like that. If you ask me that just evened the score.
[Vulcan hits Boof with a running powerbomb on to the mat, as a Vulcan sucks chant starts in the crowd.]
Jeremy Tucker- Well these fans are letting him know exactly what they think of him.
Andrew Fulton- Im sure he really cares too.
Boof gets thrown into the turnbuckle, Vulcan follows him in nailing him with a clothesline as he hits the corner. As Boof falls out of the corner, Vulcan grabs him and nails a jumping tombstone piledriver. Vulcan goes for a pin. Nick Tsalazidis counts.]
Jeremy Tucker- Thats it, thats the War Hammer~!!!
Nick Tsalazidis- 1
Andrew Fulton - Thats it, this ones in the bag ..
Nick Tsalazidis- 2
Toby Navel: Looks like youre right Fulton.
Nick Tsalazidis- 3~!!!!
Frank Salazar- Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match VUUUUUULCAN~!!!!!!
Jeremy Tucker- Well Vulcan wins, and gets to go on to meet Kota next week for the Statewide Title on No Mans Land ..
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Jun 05, 2004#4
[We cut to rookie SWAT reporter Drew Bennet standing in the backstage of the Dandennong Baseball stadium, with mic in hand.]
Drew Bennet: SWAT Australia fans, on the latest No Mans Land, you saw the debut of the second student of the former IWA Triple Crown Heavyweight champion, Jinn Blaze, wrestling out of Providence, Rhode Island. His opponent, Danny Fantom wrestled a good match, but in the end, Blazes onslaught to his arm proved too much for him, as he tapped out to the excruciating Mourning Star submission hold. Here with me now is the man himself, Jinn Blaze.
[Jinn walks onto the screen, clad in his ring attire, along with his black Oxford style shirt. His red eyes burn a hole onto the screen.]
Drew Bennet: Tonight Jinn, you have yourself a challenge a step above Danny Fantom in the first ever Ring Syndicate World Heavyweight Champion, Adam Seven. What are your thoughts going into this one/
Jinn Blaze: For the entire week, all Ive been hearing about this match is Adam Sevens name being tossed around like hes some omnipotent wrestling being sent from above to beat up the kid who got trained by Cyrus Williams. I know his track record, Bennet, Im not a idiot. Adam Seven is a great performer, a legend around these parts, if you want to toss that term around lightly. But he wont beat me. Do you know why?
Drew Bennet: No.
Jinn Blaze: Because hype will kill us all. Adam Seven is a living, breathing embodiment of a vice that too many people indulge in, hype. Hype is the cousin of hubris, the brother to exaggerated pride. Adam doesnt get it. He is born of hype, and tonight, Adam goes back to the womb of your self-importance, one cross arm scissor at a time. I am going to rip your arm out of your socket, I will not only make you submit, I will not humiliate you in front of a worldwide audience .I will crush your hype with a ten ton hammer of pure, unadulterated hatred.
Drew Bennet: Strong words from the newcomer.
Jinn Blaze: Words. They mean nothing if you cant make good on them. I make good on my words. My integrity will never, ever be broken. I say what I do, and I do what I say. I will go on in this tournament, simply because I must. I dont settle for anything less. Perfection is not enough. I want my actions to be immaculate.
[Blaze walks off, brushing by Bennet, as if he wasnt there at all.]
Drew Bennet: Jinn Blaze has guaranteed victory, and Ill be damned if I dont believe him. Back to you in the booth.
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Jun 05, 2004#5
Frank Salazar - This match is a Semi final match for a shot at the Australian Heavyweight Championship! On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 285 pounds, from Suburbia USA, Handy Andy!!! (crowd cheers ***)
["Scooby Snacks by Fun Loving Criminals hits and Handy Andy makes his way down to the ring. ]
Frank Salazar - and his opponent, weighing in at 250 pounds, from Montreal, Canada , Lonewolf McNeely!!! (crowd boos ********)
[Music cues up and red sirens go off for a few seconds. Smoke rolls across the arena curtain.
( Been scared and lonely
I've asked myself
Is something wrong with you
My girlfriend told me
I need some time alone to deal with issues
Something makes me carry on
It's difficult to understand
What I always wanna find )
Lonewolf slowly walks out of the curtains and stretches his arms back, as his long flowing hair hangs over his eyes. He jumps in the air and pumps his fist as the pyro goes off. Rain walks out and points both arms in a possessing position to Lonewolf and gets on her knees before him.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
McNeely grabs Rain by the hair and yanks her up then slams his head up and shows a fierce look in his eyes as he screams into the air and lets out a howl and growls at the fans near by. Rain leads McNeely to the ring, walking backwards and keeping her eyes on Lonewolf, as looking into his eyes is the only way he can focus.
( You always call me
And ask me how I make it throught the day
I'm always fallin
I guess it's just god's way of
Making me big*
Something makes me carry on
It's difficult to understand
What I always wanna find )
Lonewolf pays no attention to anyone as he walks with intense passion to the ring. Rain stops and stares into Lonewolfs eyes and points toward his opponent in the ring and whispers thoughts of pain and punishment.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
Rain slaps Lonewolf a few times to pump him up and get the adrenaline going. Lonewolf then jumps up onto the ring apron and opens his mouth, showing his fangs to his opponent.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle
And I,
I wonder why I try
And I,
Wonder why I bother
And I,
I wonder why I cry
Why I,
I go through all this trouble
I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
Lonewolf cracks his neck to the left, cracks his neck to the right and awaits for the match to start ]
Jeremy Tucker : Referee Nick Tsalazidis calling for the bell, and this semi final match is officially under way. Both men warily circle each other, hooking up, but Handy Andy follows through with the hook up, nailing Lonewolf with a headbutt.
[Handy Andy uppercuts Lonewolf McNeely. ]
Jeremy Tucker : Handy Andy with a uppercut.
[Handy Andy hits Lonewolf McNeely with the back of his elbow. Lonewolf McNeely gets hit with a back heel kick.]
Toby Navel : Handy Andy starting this one off like a house of fire, he is really taking it to Lonewolf.
[Lonewolf McNeely is back on his feet. Handy Andy bounces Lonewolf McNeely off the ropes and clotheslines him. Handy Andy punches Lonewolf McNeely repeatedly, sending Lonewolf in a 360 with the last big punch ... but Lonewolf keeps spinning, clocking Andy with a spinning discuss punch ........ (Lonewolf sucks chants start in the crowd.) ]
Andrew Fulton : Whats wrong with these morons? Lonewolf just took everything Andy had to offer there!
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf looks like the fans are starting to get to him, he picks Andy up, and nails him with a huge powerbomb!
Toby Navel : Lonewolf hanging on, and delivers a second powerbomb!
Jeremy Tucker : Multiple powerbombs here from Lonewolf McNeely, he lifts Andy up for a third one, and this time goes to powerbomb him over the rope to the outside, but Andy hangs on with his legs to Lonewolfs head, and both men go tumbling to the mat!
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1 ...... 2 .......3) Lonewolf McNeely is the first up, and he executes a piledriver on Handy Andy on the hard concrete floor, then Lonewolf tosses Handy Andy back into the ring.]
Toby Navel : Lonewolf follows Andy into the ring, and Handy Andy uses a closed fist on Lonewolf McNeely.
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf McNeely shakes off the punch, and delivers one of his own, followed by a kick to the stomach, and then piledrives Handy Andy head first into the mat.
Andrew Fulton : Lonewolf going after the neck of Andy, he doesn't look to handy now, does he? (Fulton chuckles)
[Lonewolf with a running sit down powerbomb, and a cover.]
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 .................. 2 ................... (Andy just gets the shoulder up.)
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf McNeely looks frustrated, and climbs to the top rope, then executes a corkscrew legdrop on Handy Andy.
[Handy Andy gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face.]
Toby Navel : Andy looks like he may be out of it, that elbow was right on the nose, and that could be broken, look at the blood now coming out of Andy's nose!
Jeremy Tucker : McNeely showing no mercy, and lifts Handy Andy high over his head in a gorilla press, spins him around and drops him into a diamond cutter!
Toby Navel : NO HUMAN CONTACT!!!
[Lonewolf McNeely goes for a pin. Referee Nick Tsalazidis makes the count. ...1 ...........2 ........... ...3!!!!!]
Jeremy Tucker : McNeely did it!
Toby Navel : He sure did, and he moves one step closer to a shot at Sam Piltdown and the Australian Heavyweight title!
[Bottem of a bottle - Smile Empty Soul hits and referee Nick Tsalazidis raises McNeely's arm.]
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Jun 05, 2004#6
[Fade in from commercial. The camera pans over the crowd and they start cheering as "Pink Slip" by The Unband blares out over the stadium. The shot goes to the bar that's been set up left of the entrance, with CK Panic in suit and tie.]
CK Panic: Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for The Big F'n Deal! I'm CK and here's the host, your champ and mine...SAM PILTDOWN!
[The crowds cheers for Sam as he makes his way out from behind the bar, a full shot glass in one hand and a bottle of Jack Daniels in the other. He sets them on the bar, followed by the SWAT Australian Heavyweight Title. He's wearing boots, jeans, and wearing his "Who's Your Champ?" t-shirt.]
Sam Piltdown: What's up, f**kers?! Well, well, well, apparently I did well enough that they're gonna let me keep doing this sh*t! Let's the monolouge sh*t out the way so I can get to the surprise. The big news of course is......
A loud sound effect of crickets chirping is heard.]
Sam Piltdown: No one's doing ANY talking. The guys who're fighting to face me haven't even mentioned me. Not even a nice glancing blow.
CK Panic: Kinda hurts the pride, huh?
Sam Piltdown: Yeah. Gets me right here.
[Sam pats his chest and let's out a loud belch. The fans laugh as Sam gives a look of mock embarassment.]
CK Panic: To be fair people are talking. Unfortunately, only a quarter of the participants for the number one contendership tourny have spoken. And Adam Seven's only done it to feed his ego. Oh wait, I think he did take a swipe at you when he was talking about facing lackeys and not the top guys.
Sam Piltdown: That's fine. All that's waiting at the end of that rainbow for him is a boot up the ass.
CK Panic: You always say that.
Sam Piltdown: It's the Piltdown way! In other news, I have a message for Ned Chambers. Roll it!
[The large screen over the entrance cuts on and Kilroy Evans is shown standing in The White Room.]
Kilroy Evans: Hey Australia, how are you? I just need to tell Ned something. Ned, The White Room is mine. I don't care if you rip it off and use something called The Green Room, The Off-White Room, The Black Room, or The Plaid Room. I see The White Room show up again and I'll be on the first plane to tear up the Down Under looking for you! And Sam, I know you used the credit card in K-Division's name to stock that bar set. I am going to----
[Sam makes a cut motion and the video cuts off. CK gives Sam a suspicious look.]
CK Panic: He seemed mad. Why would that be, Sam?
Sam Piltdown: Uh....let's get to that surprise. I have a guest tonight. He's here to start a new path after some personal setbacks and I'd appreciate it if you give it up for the one, the only, Robert Hunglestein III!
[Hunglestein makes his way out to the bar and shakes hands with CK and Sam. They all sit down at the bar as the crowd lights up with a mixed reaction of cheers and boos.]
Sam Piltdown: Hey...hey! No boos, okay? Now, if you've been keeping track of some of what's been going on with Hunglestein, you'd know he suffered a lot of bad luck recently.
Robert Hunglestein: Gee, thanks.
Sam Piltdown: But I, like many others, respect the fact that he's doing his best to pick up the pieces and carry on. And that's why I brought him out here so he could say it himself. Go ahead, man.
Robert Hunglestein: I want to announce that I plan to sign with the Australia branch of SWAT.
[There's cheers from the audience and few catcalls.]
Robert Hunglestein: Sorry sir, I don't swing that way. And I'm not just going blindly after gold.
[Sam and Rob look at the title.]
Robert Hunglestein: It's a nice title, but I just want to compete and get back on my own two feet before I'm ready for that.
Sam Piltdown: That's f**kin' awesome! Let's hear it for him and you, Australia! You've got Robert Hunglestein III!
[This time it's predominantly cheers as Sam shakes Robert's hand.]
Sam Piltdown: You know what? That's all the show I feel like doing. Hey Rob, you want to get a drink.
Robert Hunglestein: Eh, sure.
Sam Piltdown: Show's over, time for more wrasslin'!
[Sam, CK, and Robert move to leave the area but they're backed up by the commissioner, Dracon Xanathos. He's talking into a cellphone and has a microhpone on hand.]
Dracon Xanathos : (hanging up the phone) I dont know about that guy, letting his personal feelings cloud his judgement, but i am left in a hard predicament here, as Hunglestein well knows, there are certain, how would i describe them, "suits" who would prefer it he was NOT in the country, let alone in SWAT!
[The crowd boos and Robert looks downcast.]
Dracon Xanathos: What's that? Well, lucky for you fans them "suits" have appointed "me" commissioner, and its my job to make some money for this place, to get some people in those seats and pick up the ratings a bit. So, i'll tell you what we will do, i am golng to give you a shot Hunglestein, next week, right here in Dandenong, it will be you, one on one, against ....... (looks at Piltdown) you SAM PILTDOWN!
[Sam and Robert both stare at each other.]
Dracon Xanathos : Now, we all know that we currently have this big tourney going on, and we wouldn't wanting you jumping the que Robert, so, this match will be non title!
[Sam and Robert quickly close the distance between themselves and Dracon. Robert yells about a guaranteed contract, while Sam just violently shoves Dracon. Dracon shoves back and shoves Robert into the bar. Sam helps him up and then suddenly looks upset.]
Sam Piltdown: Hey, pick up the bottle of Jack, will ya?
Robert Hunglestein: Not right now, I gotta deal with this.
[Sam rips off his mic and block Hungelstein's path. He starts screaming at him over the near empty bottle. Robert doesn't back down and doesn't give an inch. Dracon moves to break it up.]
Dracon Xanathos: Ladies, break it up! Save it for the next show----
[Dracon doesn't finish as both men simultaneously deliver hard fists to him, sending Dracon flying. CK runs over to get them apart, but gets shoved across the bar stools. He stumbles up and grabs the microphone.]
CK Panic: Commercial, cut to commercial!
[The shot fades to commercial with Robert and Sam yelling in each other's faces.]
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Jun 05, 2004#7
Frank Salazar - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 202 pounds, from Providence, Rhode Island (USA), Jinn Blaze!!! (crowd cheers ****)
[[The guitar intro to Lip Gloss and Black by Atreyu begins playing as the arena grows dark. Intelligent white lights dance to the rhythm of the guitar until all the instruments kick in. The curtains part, and Jinn Blaze stands, clad in an open black button-down shirt, his white flamed-tinged cargo-style jeans, and his long hair wet and covering his face. He stands at the top of the entranceway, gazing up at the sky, palms outstretched to the side.]
#If I gave you enough pretty words
#Could you paint a picture of us that works?
#An emphasis on function rather than design
[Jinn clenches his fists and begins to walk to the ring.]
#Arent you tired, because I will carry you
#On a broken back and blown out knees
#Ive been here for a while
#For a while
[In one quick leap, he vaults onto the ring apron, and steps onto the top rope.]
#Arent you tired of being weak?
#Such rage that you could scream
#The stars right out of the sky
[Jinn flips his hair up and outstretches his palms and poses in a crucifix-style. The women in the audience go crazy, but he gets quite the mixed reaction from the males. Those that respect his wrestling background cheer, those that hate that the girls love him boo.]
#And destroy the prettiest starry night
#Every evening that I die
[Jinn jumps down into the center of the ring and drops to a knee, seemingly in prayer. He folds his hands and presses them to his forehead, rocking back and forth.]
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human .
[As the song fades away, the arena lights come back up and Jinn rises, removing his shirt and retiring to his corner.]
Frank Salazar : And his opponent, weighing in at 255 pounds, from Rock Island, IL, Adam Plummer!!!
["Battle Without Honor or Humanity" by Tomoyasu Hotei begins to play over the PA, the tasty-ass groove accompanied by the lights slowly coming down. When the brass section first hits, two blasts of pyro accent the bombast, and the spotlight catches Plummer parting the curtain, accompanied by his two female bodyguards, Yuki and Suki, the Japanese schoolgirl twins...
A7 slowly makes his way towards the ring, strutting to the beat with a bemused smirk on his face, Yuki and Suki keeping a step behind, glaring at the crowd from behind their watchful eyes. He climbs the steps and pauses on the apron, allowing Yuki and Suki to part the ropes for him. After stepping through, A7 stands silently in the center of the ring while the girls fight off the leering fanboys in the front row. After the medics have carted away the stupid bastard who invariably gets too close to the twins, the match is set to begin...]
Andrew Fulton : What a sight them Twin Orchards are, guys, i don't know if i will be able to contribute to well during this one, what with them two out here and all (shot of Fulton ogling the twins)
Toby Navel : Since when did you start contributing around here Fulton?
[Jerry and Toby have a chuckle and high five each other as the bell ring .... Fulton didn't even hear him .... he appears to be in a trance like state.]
Jeremy Tucker : Nothing like a bit of subtlety there Fulton.
[Fulton starts to drool as the shoot moves back to the ring and Jinn Blaze is testing out the ropes.]
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn makes his way into the ring, and drives a forearm into the head of Adam Plummer.
Toby Navel : Adam Plummer shakes of the elbow, and knee's jinn, then knee's him again. He is just going to town on Jinn Blaze with alternating knee strikes!
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn Blaze answers back with a forearm smash, and then a strike to the arm of Seven.
[Jinn places Seven in a wristlock.]
Toby Navel : Jinn looks to be going after the arm of Seven early on here.
[Seven reverses the Wristlock and hits Jinn with a High Angle Dropkick]
Toby Navel : Boy, how quick was Seven there! Jinn Blaze didn't even see that High Angle Dropkick. These two just are going move for move right here.
[Both men lockup. Adam Plummer sends Jinn Blaze to the corner of the ring. Short arm Clothesline by Seven, but Jinn ducks under it, and Seven bounces of the turnbuckle.]
Jeremy Tucker : We are seeing an exhibition by both of these men tonight.
[Jinn Blaze uses a swinging DDT to plant Adam Plummer's head into the mat and the women in Dandenong love it, screaming and yelling out for Jinn, he just smirks out to them .... as do Yuki and Suki, who don't look impressed.]
Andrew Fulton : ........... (some sort of grunting moaning sound, Jerry and Toby both look at him, and then to each other.)
Toby Navel - Did you see that last move?
Jeremy Tucker - Yeah, you know it, but look at Jinn, he goes right back to the arm, locking on a hammerlock.
Toby Navel - This is quality sports entertainment!
Jeremy Tucker : This is wrestling!
[Jinn Blaze chops Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze grabs Adam Plummer by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder.]
Toby Navel : Again, right to the shoulder, Jinn has been taught by the best, and it looks like he has learnt well.
[Jinn Blaze kicks Adam Plummer in the stomach. Adam Plummer gets up. Adam Plummer executes a swinging neckbreaker on Jinn Blaze. Jinn Blaze is up again. Scoop Slam by Seven]
Jeremy Tucker : No .... some how Jinn countered it, flipping over and landing on his feet, and Blaze legsweeps Plummer, then he goes right back to the arm, this time with an arm wrench to Adam Plummer.
Toby Navel : The man is merciless on the arm, this man has come in here with a game plan, and is executing that plan with precision!
Jeremy Tucker : He sure is, and how about that reversal of the scoop slam, the women here seem to of taken a shine to Jinn, and doesn't he know it.
[Adam Plummer makes it to his feet, and counters the arm wrench, lifting Jinn up and dropping him with the fireman's carry by Adam Plummer.]
Toby Navel : Seven wont be out done by Jinn. I actually think he likes this, Jinn is testing him in there, and as we all know, Seven is one of the top technical wrestlers in the world, i think he may of under estimated Jinn a bit, but not any more.
Jeremy Tucker : Adam Plummer with a nice clothesline on Jinn Blaze. Adam Plummer then trys for a Sleeper Drop but Jinn Blaze avoids it ducking down under it, but Seven is ready for him, hooking him in the Bow and Arrow Lock.
Toby Navel : How did Seven do that? These two are just countering everything each other can dish up.
[Nick Tsalazidis asks Jinn Blaze if he quits. ... Jinn Blaze is fighting the hold. ... Jinn Blaze trys to escape. .....]
Jeremy Tucker : Blaze rolls out of the bow and arrow, does a fancy flip, and then puts Seven in a Cross Arm Scissors! Unbelievable!
Toby Navel : And listen to the crowd, they cant believe what they are witnessing here! Mat wrestling at its best!
[Jinn releases the Cross Arm scissors, but only long enough to remove the legs from Seven's arm, and then surrounds his arms with his knee's and pulls upward.]
Jeremy Tucker : Cross arm scissor two!
Toby Navel : And how quick!
[Blaze releases again, and flips Seven over onto his stomach, Seven rubs his nose with his left thumb, and Jinn then wraps his legs around the arm and pulls back.]
Jeremy Tucker : Now an inverted Cross arm scissors, The Cross Arm Scissors three!
Toby Navel : Jinn just sprinted through all of them cross arm variations of his in quick succession, and he is really showing us something here tonight!
Jeremy Tucker : Hang on a sec, whats going on here?
[Yuki jumps up on the apron, and as the ref goes over to warn her, Suki springboards into the ring, catching Jinn with a nice floating legdrop.]
Andrew Fulton : Give it to him baby!
Jeremy Tucker : Get a grip Fulton!
Toby Navel : He's getting to be as bad as Lawler!
[Seven slides out of the ring, followed by Suki, and her and Yuki both are attending to Plummer, who is trying to get some movement back into his arms.]
Jeremy Tucker : SWEET JESUS!!!!
Toby Navel : OHH MY GOD!
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn just flew over the top rope taking all three out with a huge Tope Con Hilo!
[The Dandenong Basketball stadium is on its feet as one and Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1 ..... 2 ........ 3 ......)]
Toby Navel : Seven and Jinn get to there feet, both groggily, and Jinn landed awkwardly, he must of hit something there, and looks to be busted open.
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn is really taking it to Seven here tonight, both men doing exceptionally well.
[ (....4.......5..... Spinning Back Elbow from seven to Jinn]
Toby Navel - Adam Plummer with a Spinning Back Elbow.
[(...6.....) Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. (....7.......8.....) Jinn Blaze uppercuts Adam Plummer and takes Adam Plummer into the ring. Jinn Blaze chops Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze grabs Adam Plummer by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder. ]
Jeremy Tucker - Armbreaker! He is just relentless on the arm!
[Jinn Blaze with a headscissors takeover on Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze with the hammerlock on Adam Plummer. Referee Nick Tsalazidis is checking for a tap out. ... Jinn Blaze tightens the hold. ... ... Adam Plummer is fighting the hold. ... (AHHHH!) Adam Plummer escapes.]
Toby Navel : Now Adam Plummer standing. Adam Plummer uses a snap mare takeover on Jinn Blaze. Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. Jinn Blaze kicks Adam Plummer in the back of the leg. Jinn Blaze is t-bone suplexed by Adam Plummer. ]
Jeremy Tucker : Just when it looks like Jinn is getting the upper hand, Seven has an answer! That t-bone suplex was as good as you will see!
Toby Navel : What an outstanding match!
[Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. Jinn Blaze drives a forearm into the head of Adam Plummer. Adam Plummer superkicks Jinn Blaze.]
Jeremy Tucker : Again. Seven pulled that Superkick from no where!
[Seven capitalising now, and hits jinn with a Pendulum Backbreaker, he follows it up with a Belly to Belly Sitout Piledriver.]
Toby Navel : Seven now in the drivers seat, he has withstood every thing Jinn has to offer, and is now putting Jinn Blaze on the top rope ..... superplex!!!
[Seven with the cover.]
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 ............. 2 ................(Jinn kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker : Seven looking to finish Jinn off now, and he goes for the Turning of the Worm, but Jinn reverses it, into the Exsanguination and goes for the morning star, but Seven makes it to the ropes, and rubs his nose with his left thumb.
Toby Navel : Seven looks to be getting frustrated now, and here we go again, this time Suki up on the apron distracting the ref, and Seven has Jinn in a full nelson.
[Yuki rolls into the ring, and pulls out a bag of powder from her mascara case, she winds up and throws it at Jinn, who ducks out of the way, and the powder instead goes into the eyes of Seven.]
Jeremy Tucker : Blaze with the ring presence of a veteran there, grabs Yuki, and sends her sailing over the top rope, bundling Suki off the apron in the process, and he rolls up the blinded Seven.
Referee Nick Tsalazidis : 1 .............. 2 ................... 3!!!!
Toby Navel : WHAT A MATCH! And would you believe it, Jinn Blaze has just upset Adam Plummer!
Jeremy Tucker : Wow, what a night!
[Lip Gloss and Black" - Atreyu hits and the fans all give a standing ovation to both men as the scene fades.]
The shot then crosses to ring announcer Frank Salazar, in the ring.]
Frank Salazar : WELCOME TO NO MANS LAND!!!!
Jeremy Tucker : Thanks Frankie, and boy, what a show have we got in store for you all tonight fans.
Toby Navel : Thats right Jerry, this week we not only have two qualifying matches for the vacant Statewide title, but also the Semi Final's of the number one contenders tourney.
Jeremy Tucker : Sam Piltdown has been watching this tournament closely so far, and must be getting nervous about meeting the winner, there is some top competition here in Australia, and any of these four guys are well deserving of a title shot.
Toby Navel : That they are Jerry, and speaking of Sam Piltdown, last week he promised us a very special guest for his segment on this weeks show, i have been investigating all week, and haven't been able to come up with anything, i guess we will just have to wait and see who has arrived down here in Aus.
Jeremy Tucker : Yeah, i haven't heard anything either Toby, its been kept top secret, although im sure, like always Fulton, that you will claim to know what nobody else does, and then refuse to cough up the info.
Andrew Fulton : How'd you know Jerry?
Toby Navel : Typical, you know Fulton, i don't believe a word you say, you are ... how do they say it ... "Full of it!"
Andrew Fulton : So was a very special lady a bit earlier on, chock a block full of it!
Jeremy Tucker : Special lady? Do tell Fulton, is that wedding bells i hear ringing?
Andrew Fulton : Well, i wasn't feeling very well this morning, and to tell you girls the truth, i didn't think i was going to make it in for the show, so i rang up Mr Soutter to call in sick.
Toby Navel : And you chickened out, god, he sure has you wrapped around his little finger Fulton.
Andrew Fulton : Actually, he gave me some advice, he told me when he isn't feeling to well, like i wasn't, that he goes to see his wife, and she makes him feel a whole lot better.
Jeremy Tucker : So ...
Andrew Fulton : And i have never felt better in my life, that women can do wonders!
Toby Navel : YOU DID WHAT?
Jeremy Tucker : Ummm, i don't think that is what he had in mind Fulton.
Toby Navel : Your dead!
A spot light shines on a phone booth standing in the middle of the entranceway. Smoke starts to fill the phone booth as Headstrong by Trapt starts playing. When the chorus hits blue pryo falls from the ceiling onto the phone booth. Red pryo blasts from where the phone booth was. When the Smoke dissipates the phone booth is destroyed. This Just got Nasty Rolls across the Aussie-Tron. As the Crowd realizes who it is they all start to cheer.
Crowd- Ned Ned Ned Ned
The Spotlight now pans to the top of the Aussie-Tron where a man stands starring down (insert Oppenet) with his arms crossed. The Crowd just goes nuts for everyones favorite crime fighting wrestler. The man walks off the Aussie-tron to thats right nothing he is floating in the air. The man starts moving closer to the ring. As he gets closer to the ring the lights turn back on to reveal Ned Chambers floating along to the ring.]
Frank Salazar : LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE FOLLOWING MATCH IS THE FIRST FOR THE EVENING, WITH THE WINNER ADVANCING TO COMPETE FOR THE VACANT STATEWIDE TITLE, INTRODUCING FIRST, IN THE RING TO MY LEFT, HAILING FROM MASON CITY, IOWA, AND COMING IN AT 6'11 & 325 LBS.... NASTY NED CHAMBERS!!!!! - aND INTRODUCING HIS OPPONENT, HAILING FROM HAWAII AND COMING IN AT 487LBS, KOTA!!!!!
[The lights dim slowly, an image of a beautiful Island paradise shows on the screen..then it cuts to a raging volcano..hot lava flowing through a village..burning up everything in its path...the picture turns to rubble and bodies in a ruined village..then Kota appears on the screen, he is in the ring..bodysplashing a helpless opponent. Kota walks slowly to the ring and turns and looks back at the screen..nodding in approval as he slowly gets on the apron, testing out the ropes.]
Jeremy Tucker : Big match to kick things of tonight folks, with the winner of this advancing to compete for the Statewide title next show.
Andrew Fulton : Yes, we know Jerry, Frank just said the exact same thing less then one minute ago, you really do think these fans out there are stupid, dont you?
Jeremy Tucker : Kota enters the ring and he and Ned circle each other, these are two huge men in there, and know i dont think that about ther fans, just going over it for anyone who missed the introduction is all Fulton.
Andrew Fulton : What happened to our current Statewide champion anyway? Where is Adrian Tanner, and why the hell has he been stripped of the title?
[Ned and Kota both exchange big rights and lefts.]
Toby Navel : I dont think they have been able to get in contact with Tanner, and so have decided to strip him of the title.
Jeremy Tucker : These two huge men are jsut litterally beating the living daylights out of each other, and this one has jsut gotten under way, any one of them punches would put a normal man out right away, but these two are taking it and giving it right back.
[Both men hook up, and Kota throws Ned into the ropes, and Ned charges at Kota, but just bounces of off him.]
Andrew Fulton : This Kota guy is bloody huge, where did we find him? He is even bigger then Soutter!
[Ned back to his feet, and both men lock up again, Ned throwing kota into the ropes, Kota coming in to meet Nasty Ned Chambers, but he catches him with a tilt a whirl slam.]
Andrew Fulton : God damn, how did he get the big guy up in that?
Toby Navel : Power Fulton, ned is a powerhouse, plus he used his momentum.
[Kota stands up. Nasty Ned Chambers clotheslines Kota. Kota grabs Nasty Ned Chambers's head and DDT's him on the mat.]
Jeremy Tucker : Kota now getting in control here, that was a beautiful DDT from the big man, now is where he should be using all of that weight to put Ned away.
[Kota puts Nasty Ned Chambers in an arm grapevine submission.]
Toby Navel : The big guy not taking your advice Jerry, instead looks like he wants to wear out Ned.
Andrew Fulton : He's wearing me out, thats for sure, much more of this and i'll be drifting off.
Jeremy Tucker : Give it a rest Fulton, these two are giving it a good go, you cant blame Kota if he wants to go for a rest hold or two, look at the guy, he is sucking up air like he has just ran a marathon.
[Ref Tsalazidis asks Ned if he will submit, but Ned refuses, and Kota breaks the hold.]
Toby Navel : Kota picks Ned up by the throat and lifts him in the air, looks like he is going for a chokeslam here.
Jeremy Tucker : No! Ned countered it, hooking Kota and drilling his head into the mat with a big time ddt.
Toby Navel : Ned looks like he may of pulled this one off against the rookie Kota, and he is setting him up for a big powerbomb, can he get him up?
Andrew Fulton : No chance, Ned is no where near strong enough to get him up, kota is almost 500 pounds!
[Ned tries to lift Kota up for the powerbomb, but Kota is just too big and he flips him over in a back body drop.]
Toby Navel : Nasty Ned Chambers climbs to his feet, and Kota tosses him into the turnbuckle, sets himself, and charges, launching himself at Ned, and connecting with the Kota splash!
Andrew Fulton : He just moved the whole ring a good foot there!
Jeremy Tucker : Ned stumbles out of the corner, and Kota scoops him and splatters his ass all over the ring with a huge sit down piledriver!
Toby Navel : The Richter Scale!!! Kota with the cover.
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 ............ 2 ..................... 3!!!!
Toby Navel : Kota has done it, he has won this match.
Jeremy Tucker : Congrats to Kota on his debut win, he now moves on to meet the winner of Vulcan and Boof next week, lets take it to the back.
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Jun 05, 2004#2
[Cut to backstage, where we see CWA interviewer Fifi practically bursting from her bikini top. Beside her, sitting on an upside down garbage can and holding a steel brush is Handy Andy.]
Fifi - Fans, i'm joined back here tonight by Handy Andy. Andy, how are you finding your time here in SWAT?
Handy Andy - Well, Fifi, to tell you the truth, its not what i thought it would be. I had heard so much about all of these great stars that compete down here in Australia, and frankly, i haven't seen much to impress me.
Fifi - Well, last week, you sure were impressive against Nasty Ned, and this week, you are meeting Lonewolf McNeely, the winner going onto the final next week, and one step closer to Sam Piltdown and his Australian Heavyweight title.
Handy Andy - Wouldn't that make for a great story. Handy Andy, comes from no where, total obscurity to not only win the tournament, but then bring the title home, ohh yeah, thats the stuff that dreams are made of, but lets not get too ahead off ourselves.
One week at a time.
Keep a lid on it.
Your only as good as your last match.
All of them cliches, you know, they didn't become household sayings for nothing, and i may not be a household name just yet, but to quote another household saying.
Baby steps.
Fifi - So, tell us. How do you think you will fare tonight against Lonewolf?
Handy Andy - I will account for Lonewolf, don't you fret about that Lassie. He was lucky to get by Vulcan last week, and if that big masked dude was some sort of allie of his, well, i'm telling you right now, he best not get involved in my business, because i will be more then happy to drop him as well as McNeely, rip his mask off, exposing him to these great Aussie fans down here in Dandenong, and walk right past the pair of them onto the final.
Fifi - You sure do seem confident for someone in only his second match ever.
Handy Andy - Listen Lassie, if your not confident, if you don't think you can hang with the big boys, and don't want to aim for the highest, then you have no right even being in this business. Not going up against the big names of Sam Piltdown & Adam Seven, heck, if you don't have confidence in yourself, you don't even belong in there against the small fish like Lonewolf and Jinn.
Fifi - Small fish?
Handy Andy - You know it. I would love nothing more then go out there with this brush and garbage can, and do what i do best, but apparently these Aussie's are quicker to DQ you then they are to finish up in the bedroom.
Fifi - Word has it you are pretty Handy in the bedroom.
[Flutters her eyes at Handy Andy.]
Handy Andy - Handy by name, Handy by nature, be that the bedroom, the wrestling ring, or anywhere else.
Fifi - Well, there you have it guys
Handy Andy - Hold it lassie. Before we go, like i was saying earlier, these damn Aussie are so quick to DQ a man, well, i want to make this final special, i want it to mean something, so once i have finished with Lonewolf
Ha, thats a good one, isn't it.
The guy calls himself Lonewolf, yet he has this Rain bird fawning all over him, he has some masked guy winning his matches for him, and i even saw a tape of him in some strip club, with about ten guys, my friend, you are no Lonewolf, you are not even a wrestler, what you are is a joke!
A joke that Handy Andy will be more then happy to clean up.
Now, as i was saying, once i am finished with Lonewolf and his minions, well, i want the winner of the Seven / Jinn match in my kind of match. A good old fashioned Hardcore Match!
[Smashes the steel brush against the side of the bin making a big bang.]
THATS RIGHT!
I want to liven stuff up down here! I'm talking everything goes, no dq's, falls count anywhere, whatever it takes!
Fifi - Thanks for that Andy, and good luck, back to you guys.
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Jun 05, 2004#3
Jeremy Tucker- Ladies and gentlemen, lets go to Frank Salazar for the introductions on our next match up.
Frank Salazar- This match is a one fall encounter. Introducing first, in the ring already, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Parts Unknown, Boof!!!
[Theres a very mild pop for Boof]
Frank Salazar- And his opponent, weighing in at 297 pounds, hailing from an unknown location, Vulcan!!! (crowd boos ***)
Andrew Fulton- Why do people keep their hometowns a secret? Like they think someones going to come hunt them down at their front door or something.
[The lights dim slowly, followed by a somber red light illuminating the ring. Fire appears on the video screen as screams of unearthly things sound throughout the arena. "SlutGarden" by Marilyn Manson begins to play as Vulcan walks from behind the curtain. He stands on the ramp for a moment.]
Toby Navel- You never know these days Fulton .. Planes fly into buildings, war seemingly everywhere Yeah you never know just who might want to come find you.
[The red light reflects off Vulcans head as he slowly walks to the ring. He gets halfway down to the ring before he stops and removes his coat.]
Andrew Fulton- Well when you put it like that, I suppose I should start hailing from parts unknown as well
[Vulcan still stares at the ring, almost looking through it as he continues down the ramp. He walks up the steps and then along the apron until he's in the middle of the ropes on the outside.]
Toby Navel- With all the friends youve . Umm, not made, I defiantly suggest you relocate there .
[Vulcan faces the crowd and gives them a twisted smile as he steps between the middle and top rope. He then stands, watching the crowd react without even a hint of emotion.]
Andrew Fulton- What are you talking about Navel, I happen to have an over abundance of friends
Toby Navel- Keep telling yourself that
Jeremy Tucker- Now, now kids. This match is almost ready to begin.
[Boof checks out the ring. He bounces off the ropes a few times. Then turns to the referee Nick Tsalazidis, and asks him to check Vulcan's boots and knee pads.]
Andrew Fulton- If I were Vulcan, Id take offense to that. Check my boots, ugh no check his boots. This guy Boofs like the class tattle tale. Telling the ref to check Vulcans gear, give me a break.
Jeremy Tucker- Come on Fulton, would you really want to take the chance that your opponent was packing something in a kneepad if you were out there wrestling?
Andrew Fulton- Vulcan has no need for that kind of thing, has a bit too much class to even bother with it.
[ring, ring, ring]
Jeremy Tucker- Theres the bell, and were under way fans.
Toby Navel- This should be a good one.
[Boof runs across the ring, and immediately shoulder tackles Vulcan. Vulcan climbs back to his feet, and grabs Boof throwing him off the ropes and connecting with a powerful clothesline.]
Andrew Fulton- See, Boof shouldve never tried to snitch on Vulcan to the ref. Now Vulcans out to hurt someone.
Jeremy Tucker- I think Vulcans out for a win, especially now that we know the winner of this match gets to face Kota for the Statewide Championship.
Andrew Fulton- Snitches get stitches Tucker, and I think enforcing that motto is a little more important than a title shot.
[Boof struggles back to his feet. And Vulcan just kicks him in the head. Vulcan drops for a pin.]
Nick Tsalazidis- 1
[Boof kicks out. ]
Toby Navel - A little early for a pin attempt. Especially with an opponent like Boof.
Jeremy Tucker: Yeah, Vulcan was probably a bit premature with that pin attempt. Needs to wear Boof down a bit more than that.
Andrew Fulton- Cant fault the man for trying to end this one quickly, its not like hes being paid by the hour.
[Boof stands up. Boof attempts a waistlock suplex, but he doesnt have the power to lift Vulcan.]
Jeremy Tucker - This ones moving fast, but its turning into an outstanding match.
[Finally giving up on the suplex, Boof runs and tackles Vulcan. He then mounts Vulcan and begins to punch him in the head.]
Andrew Fulton- I thought closed fists were illegal?
[Vulcan manages to get out from under Boof, but Boof hits Vulcan an elbow drop as Vulcan tries to get back to his feet. Boof then lifts Vulcan, who nails him with a straight shot to the face for his troubles.]
Toby Navel: Thats one way to turn the tempo
Jeremy Tucker: Not exactly the most fair way, but it got the job done I suppose.
Andrew Fulton: Who ever told you life was going to be fair, Tucker?
[Boof gets thrown into the corner. Vulcan comes over and begins smashing Boof's head into the turnbuckles. Vulcan the whips Boof out of the corner and off the far side ropes meeting him with a big clothesline. Vulcan then comes in and begins to lay the boots to Boof, but Boof reaches up and grabs Vulcans trunks, then rolls over hurling Vulcan out of the ring.]
Andrew Fulton- Im defiantly not a fan, but that was smart thinking on behalf of Boof.
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1) ]
Toby Navel - Looks like the action is going to move outside now.
[Boof rolls out to the floor, but is met with a swift kick to the head once he gets there. (..2)]
Jeremy Tucker- Hard shot to the head from Vulcan, but Boof keeps approaching. Hes determined to get the upper hand.
[Vulcan delivers a kick to the head of Boof, which finally staggers him ( 3). Vulcan punches away on Boof. (....4) Vulcan gets hit with a back heel kick. (.....5) The two men fight into the aisle.]
Toby Navel- These two better not go too far, theyre already on the 5 count.
Boof and Vulcan move back to ringside. Boof throws Vulcan into the ring, they lockup. Boof sends Vulcan to the corner of the ring and comes from behind with a bulldog on Vulcan. Boof stands over Vulcan as he struggles back up to his feet.]
Andrew Fulton- I cant believe Boof has managed this kind of offense on Vulcan, I figure this one would be lopsided like a motherfu
Jeremy Tucker- Watch your mouth Fulton Just because were not in America doesnt mean you can start dropping the F-bomb on television.
Andrew Fulton- Piltown does it .
Toby Navel- And he gets fined for it to
Andrew Fulton- Ugh .
[Boof tries for a spinning backbreaker but is unable hit it. He follows that with a front slam, and then sends Vulcan to the outside again.]
Jeremy Tucker- Back to the floor
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1) Boof hits a reverse crucifix powerbomb on Vulcan.(..2) ]
Toby Navel - Boof is in firm control at this point of the match.
Jeremy Tucker - These two have fought all over the ringside area tonight, in and out of the ring, on the floor, about the only place they havent been is on our table.
Andrew Fulton- Yet .
[Boof nails Vulcan with a springboard dropkick. Boof climbs to his feet. (...3) ]
Jeremy Tucker - Yeah, lets hope they forget were over here.
[(....4) Vulcan takes the advantage by whipping Boof into the guard rail.(.....5) Vulcan continues to bounce Boofs head off the rail, then he throws Boof back into the ring. Vulcan delivers a knee to the midsection of Boof, which sends Boof to the mat. Boof struggles to climb to his feet as he finally manages to get to his feet, Vulcan runs to the ropes, but Boof catches him with a huge boot, right to the mush! ]
Jeremy Tucker - Nice boot by Boof.
Toby Navel- Holy Jesus, that was a brutal shot.
[Boof puts Vulcan in the cobra clutch. Nick Tsalazidis asks Vulcan if he quits. ... (AHHHH!) ... ... ... ]
Jeremy Tucker- Cobra clutch from Boof . And Vulcans howling out in pain.
Andrew Fulton- Thats not pain you imbecile. Vulcans just letting us know hes about to make his move.
[Boof breaks the hold, and punches Vulcan repeatedly. Boof throws Vulcan into the ropes, and then mounts him with the Lou Thesz Press. Boof pulls Vulcan to his feet, but is met with a low knee as Vulcan gets to his feet.]
Jeremy Tucker- COME ON REF, THAT WAS LOW~!!!
Andrew Fulton- Come on nothing, that was smart. Youve been applauding Boof the whole match when hes being doing nothing but cheap moves like that. If you ask me that just evened the score.
[Vulcan hits Boof with a running powerbomb on to the mat, as a Vulcan sucks chant starts in the crowd.]
Jeremy Tucker- Well these fans are letting him know exactly what they think of him.
Andrew Fulton- Im sure he really cares too.
Boof gets thrown into the turnbuckle, Vulcan follows him in nailing him with a clothesline as he hits the corner. As Boof falls out of the corner, Vulcan grabs him and nails a jumping tombstone piledriver. Vulcan goes for a pin. Nick Tsalazidis counts.]
Jeremy Tucker- Thats it, thats the War Hammer~!!!
Nick Tsalazidis- 1
Andrew Fulton - Thats it, this ones in the bag ..
Nick Tsalazidis- 2
Toby Navel: Looks like youre right Fulton.
Nick Tsalazidis- 3~!!!!
Frank Salazar- Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match VUUUUUULCAN~!!!!!!
Jeremy Tucker- Well Vulcan wins, and gets to go on to meet Kota next week for the Statewide Title on No Mans Land ..
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Jun 05, 2004#4
[We cut to rookie SWAT reporter Drew Bennet standing in the backstage of the Dandennong Baseball stadium, with mic in hand.]
Drew Bennet: SWAT Australia fans, on the latest No Mans Land, you saw the debut of the second student of the former IWA Triple Crown Heavyweight champion, Jinn Blaze, wrestling out of Providence, Rhode Island. His opponent, Danny Fantom wrestled a good match, but in the end, Blazes onslaught to his arm proved too much for him, as he tapped out to the excruciating Mourning Star submission hold. Here with me now is the man himself, Jinn Blaze.
[Jinn walks onto the screen, clad in his ring attire, along with his black Oxford style shirt. His red eyes burn a hole onto the screen.]
Drew Bennet: Tonight Jinn, you have yourself a challenge a step above Danny Fantom in the first ever Ring Syndicate World Heavyweight Champion, Adam Seven. What are your thoughts going into this one/
Jinn Blaze: For the entire week, all Ive been hearing about this match is Adam Sevens name being tossed around like hes some omnipotent wrestling being sent from above to beat up the kid who got trained by Cyrus Williams. I know his track record, Bennet, Im not a idiot. Adam Seven is a great performer, a legend around these parts, if you want to toss that term around lightly. But he wont beat me. Do you know why?
Drew Bennet: No.
Jinn Blaze: Because hype will kill us all. Adam Seven is a living, breathing embodiment of a vice that too many people indulge in, hype. Hype is the cousin of hubris, the brother to exaggerated pride. Adam doesnt get it. He is born of hype, and tonight, Adam goes back to the womb of your self-importance, one cross arm scissor at a time. I am going to rip your arm out of your socket, I will not only make you submit, I will not humiliate you in front of a worldwide audience .I will crush your hype with a ten ton hammer of pure, unadulterated hatred.
Drew Bennet: Strong words from the newcomer.
Jinn Blaze: Words. They mean nothing if you cant make good on them. I make good on my words. My integrity will never, ever be broken. I say what I do, and I do what I say. I will go on in this tournament, simply because I must. I dont settle for anything less. Perfection is not enough. I want my actions to be immaculate.
[Blaze walks off, brushing by Bennet, as if he wasnt there at all.]
Drew Bennet: Jinn Blaze has guaranteed victory, and Ill be damned if I dont believe him. Back to you in the booth.
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Jun 05, 2004#5
Frank Salazar - This match is a Semi final match for a shot at the Australian Heavyweight Championship! On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 285 pounds, from Suburbia USA, Handy Andy!!! (crowd cheers ***)
["Scooby Snacks by Fun Loving Criminals hits and Handy Andy makes his way down to the ring. ]
Frank Salazar - and his opponent, weighing in at 250 pounds, from Montreal, Canada , Lonewolf McNeely!!! (crowd boos ********)
[Music cues up and red sirens go off for a few seconds. Smoke rolls across the arena curtain.
( Been scared and lonely
I've asked myself
Is something wrong with you
My girlfriend told me
I need some time alone to deal with issues
Something makes me carry on
It's difficult to understand
What I always wanna find )
Lonewolf slowly walks out of the curtains and stretches his arms back, as his long flowing hair hangs over his eyes. He jumps in the air and pumps his fist as the pyro goes off. Rain walks out and points both arms in a possessing position to Lonewolf and gets on her knees before him.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
McNeely grabs Rain by the hair and yanks her up then slams his head up and shows a fierce look in his eyes as he screams into the air and lets out a howl and growls at the fans near by. Rain leads McNeely to the ring, walking backwards and keeping her eyes on Lonewolf, as looking into his eyes is the only way he can focus.
( You always call me
And ask me how I make it throught the day
I'm always fallin
I guess it's just god's way of
Making me big*
Something makes me carry on
It's difficult to understand
What I always wanna find )
Lonewolf pays no attention to anyone as he walks with intense passion to the ring. Rain stops and stares into Lonewolfs eyes and points toward his opponent in the ring and whispers thoughts of pain and punishment.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
Rain slaps Lonewolf a few times to pump him up and get the adrenaline going. Lonewolf then jumps up onto the ring apron and opens his mouth, showing his fangs to his opponent.
( I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle
And I,
I wonder why I try
And I,
Wonder why I bother
And I,
I wonder why I cry
Why I,
I go through all this trouble
I do it for the drugs
I do it just to feel alive
I do it for the love
That I get from the bottom
Of a bottle )
Lonewolf cracks his neck to the left, cracks his neck to the right and awaits for the match to start ]
Jeremy Tucker : Referee Nick Tsalazidis calling for the bell, and this semi final match is officially under way. Both men warily circle each other, hooking up, but Handy Andy follows through with the hook up, nailing Lonewolf with a headbutt.
[Handy Andy uppercuts Lonewolf McNeely. ]
Jeremy Tucker : Handy Andy with a uppercut.
[Handy Andy hits Lonewolf McNeely with the back of his elbow. Lonewolf McNeely gets hit with a back heel kick.]
Toby Navel : Handy Andy starting this one off like a house of fire, he is really taking it to Lonewolf.
[Lonewolf McNeely is back on his feet. Handy Andy bounces Lonewolf McNeely off the ropes and clotheslines him. Handy Andy punches Lonewolf McNeely repeatedly, sending Lonewolf in a 360 with the last big punch ... but Lonewolf keeps spinning, clocking Andy with a spinning discuss punch ........ (Lonewolf sucks chants start in the crowd.) ]
Andrew Fulton : Whats wrong with these morons? Lonewolf just took everything Andy had to offer there!
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf looks like the fans are starting to get to him, he picks Andy up, and nails him with a huge powerbomb!
Toby Navel : Lonewolf hanging on, and delivers a second powerbomb!
Jeremy Tucker : Multiple powerbombs here from Lonewolf McNeely, he lifts Andy up for a third one, and this time goes to powerbomb him over the rope to the outside, but Andy hangs on with his legs to Lonewolfs head, and both men go tumbling to the mat!
[Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1 ...... 2 .......3) Lonewolf McNeely is the first up, and he executes a piledriver on Handy Andy on the hard concrete floor, then Lonewolf tosses Handy Andy back into the ring.]
Toby Navel : Lonewolf follows Andy into the ring, and Handy Andy uses a closed fist on Lonewolf McNeely.
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf McNeely shakes off the punch, and delivers one of his own, followed by a kick to the stomach, and then piledrives Handy Andy head first into the mat.
Andrew Fulton : Lonewolf going after the neck of Andy, he doesn't look to handy now, does he? (Fulton chuckles)
[Lonewolf with a running sit down powerbomb, and a cover.]
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 .................. 2 ................... (Andy just gets the shoulder up.)
Jeremy Tucker : Lonewolf McNeely looks frustrated, and climbs to the top rope, then executes a corkscrew legdrop on Handy Andy.
[Handy Andy gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face.]
Toby Navel : Andy looks like he may be out of it, that elbow was right on the nose, and that could be broken, look at the blood now coming out of Andy's nose!
Jeremy Tucker : McNeely showing no mercy, and lifts Handy Andy high over his head in a gorilla press, spins him around and drops him into a diamond cutter!
Toby Navel : NO HUMAN CONTACT!!!
[Lonewolf McNeely goes for a pin. Referee Nick Tsalazidis makes the count. ...1 ...........2 ........... ...3!!!!!]
Jeremy Tucker : McNeely did it!
Toby Navel : He sure did, and he moves one step closer to a shot at Sam Piltdown and the Australian Heavyweight title!
[Bottem of a bottle - Smile Empty Soul hits and referee Nick Tsalazidis raises McNeely's arm.]
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Jun 05, 2004#6
[Fade in from commercial. The camera pans over the crowd and they start cheering as "Pink Slip" by The Unband blares out over the stadium. The shot goes to the bar that's been set up left of the entrance, with CK Panic in suit and tie.]
CK Panic: Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for The Big F'n Deal! I'm CK and here's the host, your champ and mine...SAM PILTDOWN!
[The crowds cheers for Sam as he makes his way out from behind the bar, a full shot glass in one hand and a bottle of Jack Daniels in the other. He sets them on the bar, followed by the SWAT Australian Heavyweight Title. He's wearing boots, jeans, and wearing his "Who's Your Champ?" t-shirt.]
Sam Piltdown: What's up, f**kers?! Well, well, well, apparently I did well enough that they're gonna let me keep doing this sh*t! Let's the monolouge sh*t out the way so I can get to the surprise. The big news of course is......
A loud sound effect of crickets chirping is heard.]
Sam Piltdown: No one's doing ANY talking. The guys who're fighting to face me haven't even mentioned me. Not even a nice glancing blow.
CK Panic: Kinda hurts the pride, huh?
Sam Piltdown: Yeah. Gets me right here.
[Sam pats his chest and let's out a loud belch. The fans laugh as Sam gives a look of mock embarassment.]
CK Panic: To be fair people are talking. Unfortunately, only a quarter of the participants for the number one contendership tourny have spoken. And Adam Seven's only done it to feed his ego. Oh wait, I think he did take a swipe at you when he was talking about facing lackeys and not the top guys.
Sam Piltdown: That's fine. All that's waiting at the end of that rainbow for him is a boot up the ass.
CK Panic: You always say that.
Sam Piltdown: It's the Piltdown way! In other news, I have a message for Ned Chambers. Roll it!
[The large screen over the entrance cuts on and Kilroy Evans is shown standing in The White Room.]
Kilroy Evans: Hey Australia, how are you? I just need to tell Ned something. Ned, The White Room is mine. I don't care if you rip it off and use something called The Green Room, The Off-White Room, The Black Room, or The Plaid Room. I see The White Room show up again and I'll be on the first plane to tear up the Down Under looking for you! And Sam, I know you used the credit card in K-Division's name to stock that bar set. I am going to----
[Sam makes a cut motion and the video cuts off. CK gives Sam a suspicious look.]
CK Panic: He seemed mad. Why would that be, Sam?
Sam Piltdown: Uh....let's get to that surprise. I have a guest tonight. He's here to start a new path after some personal setbacks and I'd appreciate it if you give it up for the one, the only, Robert Hunglestein III!
[Hunglestein makes his way out to the bar and shakes hands with CK and Sam. They all sit down at the bar as the crowd lights up with a mixed reaction of cheers and boos.]
Sam Piltdown: Hey...hey! No boos, okay? Now, if you've been keeping track of some of what's been going on with Hunglestein, you'd know he suffered a lot of bad luck recently.
Robert Hunglestein: Gee, thanks.
Sam Piltdown: But I, like many others, respect the fact that he's doing his best to pick up the pieces and carry on. And that's why I brought him out here so he could say it himself. Go ahead, man.
Robert Hunglestein: I want to announce that I plan to sign with the Australia branch of SWAT.
[There's cheers from the audience and few catcalls.]
Robert Hunglestein: Sorry sir, I don't swing that way. And I'm not just going blindly after gold.
[Sam and Rob look at the title.]
Robert Hunglestein: It's a nice title, but I just want to compete and get back on my own two feet before I'm ready for that.
Sam Piltdown: That's f**kin' awesome! Let's hear it for him and you, Australia! You've got Robert Hunglestein III!
[This time it's predominantly cheers as Sam shakes Robert's hand.]
Sam Piltdown: You know what? That's all the show I feel like doing. Hey Rob, you want to get a drink.
Robert Hunglestein: Eh, sure.
Sam Piltdown: Show's over, time for more wrasslin'!
[Sam, CK, and Robert move to leave the area but they're backed up by the commissioner, Dracon Xanathos. He's talking into a cellphone and has a microhpone on hand.]
Dracon Xanathos : (hanging up the phone) I dont know about that guy, letting his personal feelings cloud his judgement, but i am left in a hard predicament here, as Hunglestein well knows, there are certain, how would i describe them, "suits" who would prefer it he was NOT in the country, let alone in SWAT!
[The crowd boos and Robert looks downcast.]
Dracon Xanathos: What's that? Well, lucky for you fans them "suits" have appointed "me" commissioner, and its my job to make some money for this place, to get some people in those seats and pick up the ratings a bit. So, i'll tell you what we will do, i am golng to give you a shot Hunglestein, next week, right here in Dandenong, it will be you, one on one, against ....... (looks at Piltdown) you SAM PILTDOWN!
[Sam and Robert both stare at each other.]
Dracon Xanathos : Now, we all know that we currently have this big tourney going on, and we wouldn't wanting you jumping the que Robert, so, this match will be non title!
[Sam and Robert quickly close the distance between themselves and Dracon. Robert yells about a guaranteed contract, while Sam just violently shoves Dracon. Dracon shoves back and shoves Robert into the bar. Sam helps him up and then suddenly looks upset.]
Sam Piltdown: Hey, pick up the bottle of Jack, will ya?
Robert Hunglestein: Not right now, I gotta deal with this.
[Sam rips off his mic and block Hungelstein's path. He starts screaming at him over the near empty bottle. Robert doesn't back down and doesn't give an inch. Dracon moves to break it up.]
Dracon Xanathos: Ladies, break it up! Save it for the next show----
[Dracon doesn't finish as both men simultaneously deliver hard fists to him, sending Dracon flying. CK runs over to get them apart, but gets shoved across the bar stools. He stumbles up and grabs the microphone.]
CK Panic: Commercial, cut to commercial!
[The shot fades to commercial with Robert and Sam yelling in each other's faces.]
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Jun 05, 2004#7
Frank Salazar - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 202 pounds, from Providence, Rhode Island (USA), Jinn Blaze!!! (crowd cheers ****)
[[The guitar intro to Lip Gloss and Black by Atreyu begins playing as the arena grows dark. Intelligent white lights dance to the rhythm of the guitar until all the instruments kick in. The curtains part, and Jinn Blaze stands, clad in an open black button-down shirt, his white flamed-tinged cargo-style jeans, and his long hair wet and covering his face. He stands at the top of the entranceway, gazing up at the sky, palms outstretched to the side.]
#If I gave you enough pretty words
#Could you paint a picture of us that works?
#An emphasis on function rather than design
[Jinn clenches his fists and begins to walk to the ring.]
#Arent you tired, because I will carry you
#On a broken back and blown out knees
#Ive been here for a while
#For a while
[In one quick leap, he vaults onto the ring apron, and steps onto the top rope.]
#Arent you tired of being weak?
#Such rage that you could scream
#The stars right out of the sky
[Jinn flips his hair up and outstretches his palms and poses in a crucifix-style. The women in the audience go crazy, but he gets quite the mixed reaction from the males. Those that respect his wrestling background cheer, those that hate that the girls love him boo.]
#And destroy the prettiest starry night
#Every evening that I die
[Jinn jumps down into the center of the ring and drops to a knee, seemingly in prayer. He folds his hands and presses them to his forehead, rocking back and forth.]
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold
#I am exhumed, just a little less human .
[As the song fades away, the arena lights come back up and Jinn rises, removing his shirt and retiring to his corner.]
Frank Salazar : And his opponent, weighing in at 255 pounds, from Rock Island, IL, Adam Plummer!!!
["Battle Without Honor or Humanity" by Tomoyasu Hotei begins to play over the PA, the tasty-ass groove accompanied by the lights slowly coming down. When the brass section first hits, two blasts of pyro accent the bombast, and the spotlight catches Plummer parting the curtain, accompanied by his two female bodyguards, Yuki and Suki, the Japanese schoolgirl twins...
A7 slowly makes his way towards the ring, strutting to the beat with a bemused smirk on his face, Yuki and Suki keeping a step behind, glaring at the crowd from behind their watchful eyes. He climbs the steps and pauses on the apron, allowing Yuki and Suki to part the ropes for him. After stepping through, A7 stands silently in the center of the ring while the girls fight off the leering fanboys in the front row. After the medics have carted away the stupid bastard who invariably gets too close to the twins, the match is set to begin...]
Andrew Fulton : What a sight them Twin Orchards are, guys, i don't know if i will be able to contribute to well during this one, what with them two out here and all (shot of Fulton ogling the twins)
Toby Navel : Since when did you start contributing around here Fulton?
[Jerry and Toby have a chuckle and high five each other as the bell ring .... Fulton didn't even hear him .... he appears to be in a trance like state.]
Jeremy Tucker : Nothing like a bit of subtlety there Fulton.
[Fulton starts to drool as the shoot moves back to the ring and Jinn Blaze is testing out the ropes.]
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn makes his way into the ring, and drives a forearm into the head of Adam Plummer.
Toby Navel : Adam Plummer shakes of the elbow, and knee's jinn, then knee's him again. He is just going to town on Jinn Blaze with alternating knee strikes!
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn Blaze answers back with a forearm smash, and then a strike to the arm of Seven.
[Jinn places Seven in a wristlock.]
Toby Navel : Jinn looks to be going after the arm of Seven early on here.
[Seven reverses the Wristlock and hits Jinn with a High Angle Dropkick]
Toby Navel : Boy, how quick was Seven there! Jinn Blaze didn't even see that High Angle Dropkick. These two just are going move for move right here.
[Both men lockup. Adam Plummer sends Jinn Blaze to the corner of the ring. Short arm Clothesline by Seven, but Jinn ducks under it, and Seven bounces of the turnbuckle.]
Jeremy Tucker : We are seeing an exhibition by both of these men tonight.
[Jinn Blaze uses a swinging DDT to plant Adam Plummer's head into the mat and the women in Dandenong love it, screaming and yelling out for Jinn, he just smirks out to them .... as do Yuki and Suki, who don't look impressed.]
Andrew Fulton : ........... (some sort of grunting moaning sound, Jerry and Toby both look at him, and then to each other.)
Toby Navel - Did you see that last move?
Jeremy Tucker - Yeah, you know it, but look at Jinn, he goes right back to the arm, locking on a hammerlock.
Toby Navel - This is quality sports entertainment!
Jeremy Tucker : This is wrestling!
[Jinn Blaze chops Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze grabs Adam Plummer by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder.]
Toby Navel : Again, right to the shoulder, Jinn has been taught by the best, and it looks like he has learnt well.
[Jinn Blaze kicks Adam Plummer in the stomach. Adam Plummer gets up. Adam Plummer executes a swinging neckbreaker on Jinn Blaze. Jinn Blaze is up again. Scoop Slam by Seven]
Jeremy Tucker : No .... some how Jinn countered it, flipping over and landing on his feet, and Blaze legsweeps Plummer, then he goes right back to the arm, this time with an arm wrench to Adam Plummer.
Toby Navel : The man is merciless on the arm, this man has come in here with a game plan, and is executing that plan with precision!
Jeremy Tucker : He sure is, and how about that reversal of the scoop slam, the women here seem to of taken a shine to Jinn, and doesn't he know it.
[Adam Plummer makes it to his feet, and counters the arm wrench, lifting Jinn up and dropping him with the fireman's carry by Adam Plummer.]
Toby Navel : Seven wont be out done by Jinn. I actually think he likes this, Jinn is testing him in there, and as we all know, Seven is one of the top technical wrestlers in the world, i think he may of under estimated Jinn a bit, but not any more.
Jeremy Tucker : Adam Plummer with a nice clothesline on Jinn Blaze. Adam Plummer then trys for a Sleeper Drop but Jinn Blaze avoids it ducking down under it, but Seven is ready for him, hooking him in the Bow and Arrow Lock.
Toby Navel : How did Seven do that? These two are just countering everything each other can dish up.
[Nick Tsalazidis asks Jinn Blaze if he quits. ... Jinn Blaze is fighting the hold. ... Jinn Blaze trys to escape. .....]
Jeremy Tucker : Blaze rolls out of the bow and arrow, does a fancy flip, and then puts Seven in a Cross Arm Scissors! Unbelievable!
Toby Navel : And listen to the crowd, they cant believe what they are witnessing here! Mat wrestling at its best!
[Jinn releases the Cross Arm scissors, but only long enough to remove the legs from Seven's arm, and then surrounds his arms with his knee's and pulls upward.]
Jeremy Tucker : Cross arm scissor two!
Toby Navel : And how quick!
[Blaze releases again, and flips Seven over onto his stomach, Seven rubs his nose with his left thumb, and Jinn then wraps his legs around the arm and pulls back.]
Jeremy Tucker : Now an inverted Cross arm scissors, The Cross Arm Scissors three!
Toby Navel : Jinn just sprinted through all of them cross arm variations of his in quick succession, and he is really showing us something here tonight!
Jeremy Tucker : Hang on a sec, whats going on here?
[Yuki jumps up on the apron, and as the ref goes over to warn her, Suki springboards into the ring, catching Jinn with a nice floating legdrop.]
Andrew Fulton : Give it to him baby!
Jeremy Tucker : Get a grip Fulton!
Toby Navel : He's getting to be as bad as Lawler!
[Seven slides out of the ring, followed by Suki, and her and Yuki both are attending to Plummer, who is trying to get some movement back into his arms.]
Jeremy Tucker : SWEET JESUS!!!!
Toby Navel : OHH MY GOD!
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn just flew over the top rope taking all three out with a huge Tope Con Hilo!
[The Dandenong Basketball stadium is on its feet as one and Nick Tsalazidis starts the count (.1 ..... 2 ........ 3 ......)]
Toby Navel : Seven and Jinn get to there feet, both groggily, and Jinn landed awkwardly, he must of hit something there, and looks to be busted open.
Jeremy Tucker : Jinn is really taking it to Seven here tonight, both men doing exceptionally well.
[ (....4.......5..... Spinning Back Elbow from seven to Jinn]
Toby Navel - Adam Plummer with a Spinning Back Elbow.
[(...6.....) Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. (....7.......8.....) Jinn Blaze uppercuts Adam Plummer and takes Adam Plummer into the ring. Jinn Blaze chops Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze grabs Adam Plummer by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder. ]
Jeremy Tucker - Armbreaker! He is just relentless on the arm!
[Jinn Blaze with a headscissors takeover on Adam Plummer. Jinn Blaze with the hammerlock on Adam Plummer. Referee Nick Tsalazidis is checking for a tap out. ... Jinn Blaze tightens the hold. ... ... Adam Plummer is fighting the hold. ... (AHHHH!) Adam Plummer escapes.]
Toby Navel : Now Adam Plummer standing. Adam Plummer uses a snap mare takeover on Jinn Blaze. Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. Jinn Blaze kicks Adam Plummer in the back of the leg. Jinn Blaze is t-bone suplexed by Adam Plummer. ]
Jeremy Tucker : Just when it looks like Jinn is getting the upper hand, Seven has an answer! That t-bone suplex was as good as you will see!
Toby Navel : What an outstanding match!
[Adam Plummer punches Jinn Blaze repeatedly. Jinn Blaze drives a forearm into the head of Adam Plummer. Adam Plummer superkicks Jinn Blaze.]
Jeremy Tucker : Again. Seven pulled that Superkick from no where!
[Seven capitalising now, and hits jinn with a Pendulum Backbreaker, he follows it up with a Belly to Belly Sitout Piledriver.]
Toby Navel : Seven now in the drivers seat, he has withstood every thing Jinn has to offer, and is now putting Jinn Blaze on the top rope ..... superplex!!!
[Seven with the cover.]
Nick Tsalazidis : 1 ............. 2 ................(Jinn kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker : Seven looking to finish Jinn off now, and he goes for the Turning of the Worm, but Jinn reverses it, into the Exsanguination and goes for the morning star, but Seven makes it to the ropes, and rubs his nose with his left thumb.
Toby Navel : Seven looks to be getting frustrated now, and here we go again, this time Suki up on the apron distracting the ref, and Seven has Jinn in a full nelson.
[Yuki rolls into the ring, and pulls out a bag of powder from her mascara case, she winds up and throws it at Jinn, who ducks out of the way, and the powder instead goes into the eyes of Seven.]
Jeremy Tucker : Blaze with the ring presence of a veteran there, grabs Yuki, and sends her sailing over the top rope, bundling Suki off the apron in the process, and he rolls up the blinded Seven.
Referee Nick Tsalazidis : 1 .............. 2 ................... 3!!!!
Toby Navel : WHAT A MATCH! And would you believe it, Jinn Blaze has just upset Adam Plummer!
Jeremy Tucker : Wow, what a night!
[Lip Gloss and Black" - Atreyu hits and the fans all give a standing ovation to both men as the scene fades.]
