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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:37:43 GMT -5
[Open up to a throwback diner, the tablecloths are all red and white checked, and the floors are wood. A hairy man in a wifebeater and apron lean on the counter. SWAT sensation Alice wipes a table with a rag when a bell jingles from the doorway.]
Alice: Welcome to
. NICK!
[The Butcher of Bakersfield stands in the doorway decked out in a pair of Falta G Jeans, a STRONG STYLE SOLDIER t-shirt, and work boots. The Blue Bombshell Sheila is on his arm.]
Alice : Come in, come in, sit down sit down ... best seat in the house!
Nick [to Sheila]: Told you this place was worth the drive.
Sheila: What drive? We where still at your Grandmas house, we drove five minutes to get here.
[Alice motions them to a table that looks exactly the same as the others, then grabs two menus, handing them over.]
Alice : What can we get for you? On the house!
Sheila: Thank you Alice.
Boss : WHAT?
[Nick cocks his eyebrow.]
Alice : On the house! Just think how much takings will go up when the hear the SWAT World Champion Nick collyer dines here.
Nick: Exactly my good man. I'm good for business.
[Sheila and Nick ponder over their menus.]
Nick: You got a ride up to Orem, Al?
Alice : I do now! Arriving with the World Champ! My days picking up.
could of been two world Champs arriving together, but that situation will be remedied before to long.
Sheila: Of course, you'll get your title back sweetie. I think I'll have the Huevos Rancheros.
Nick: Double Down Cheeseburger Deluxe for me Ally, my dear.
Sheila: You and your burgers.
Nick: You and your eggs and ham.
Alice : So Nick, big match for you coming up against Sinclair, your first defence, right?
Nick: Not quite. Second. [Nick hands Alice the menus.] First regional tour of the belt though.
Sheila: You can't overlook Dave Sadler's crack at the belt.
Alice : Thats right, forgot about that, after my match at Broken Hearts, the rest of the nights a bit of a blur.
** DING DING ***
[Two drunk rednecks stagger in, plonking themselves down at the counter.]
Drunk 1 : Alice! Two shots, on the double!
[The second drunk stares at Sheila, with a twisted smile on his face.]
Sheila: Can I help you mate?
Drunk 2: You bet you can, come on over here and sitdow'.
[Sheila saunters over and gives the drunk a smart slap to the face.]
Alice: You tell'em Sheila.
Drunk 1 : Shut up wench, and get them shots (points to Collyer) you should keep that dog on a leash!
[Nick smiles, and kicks the stool out from under the first drunk, and locks on a Kimura as fast as he hits the floor.]
Nick: Now what was that you where saying?
[Drunk 2 looks angrily up at Shiela, grabs her roughly by the hair, smashing a glass bottle of sauce on the counter and holding its broken edge at Sheila's throat.]
Nick: I wouldn't do that, slick.
Drunk 2: Why not?
[Alice grabs the arm holding the bottle and spins it around into a hammerlock, and Sheila stomps down on his foot, and then jabs her elbow into his nose.]
Nick: Numbers.
Drunk 1 : We know where you work bitch!
Sheila: At least she has a job.
[Nick cranks up on the Kimura harder, the first drunk yelps a little, then Alice clonks him over the head with a fry pan.]
Alice : You think im worried about two hicks like you, show your ugly faces here again you'll know about it!
[Alice grabs the second drunk by the shirt and the belt and tosses him out the front door.]
Nick [letting the first drunk slump unconcious to the floor.]: What are we going to do with Tweedle Dee here?
Alice: Mack!!! Call the cops. We got an unconcious man here.
[Mack comes dashing out of the back, phone in hand, and out of breath.]
Mack: I'm already on it. Yes, officer, two deplorable drunks, roughing up MY establishment. Good thing I did a little boxing in the Army during Nam.
Showed them what's what
[Nick and Alice look at each other exchanging expressions.]
..Of course I'm out of breath officer. I had two drunks in my place... had to deal with them.
[Sheila sits down and puts some Hot Sauce on her eggs, and starts to eat them.]
Nick: When you off Al? We can pick you up for the ride up north.
[Nick salts his fries, and dips them in Fry Sauce.]
Mack : By the looks of this place, im not sure she'll be able to make it tonight, a lot of cleaning up to do here now.
Nick: Better get started then...
Sheila: Nick doesn't like to be late.
[Alice hands back the mop that Mack had given her, and smiles.]
Nick: We're heading out as soon as I'm done with this burger.
Mack: But... but... but...
Sheila: He always stutter like that?
Alice : We've done about enough around here tonight, regardless what you tell them cops. If you think for one second serving coffee's in this hole means as much to me as my wrestling career, think again!
Nick: Calm down, Al. I mean the man made a mess dealing with two drunks. I was always taught to clean up after myself... don't you agree?
Sheila: Your boxing skills where amazing Mack.
Mack: They were... are... aren't they?
Nick: That first guy didn't have a chance... one, two, left, right. Not a chance.
[Mack shadowboxes some as he starts to mop the floor, pausing every so often to throw a jab or two. Alice takes her apron off, tossing it on the counter and getting her keys.]
Nick: Where you going Al? I ain't done yet. Oh fine.
[Nick grabs a handful of fries, and what is left of his burger.]
Mack (as they head for the door) : See you tomorrow Alice?
[Alice says something unintelligible.]
Mack: What?
Sheila: She said "See you then."
Mack: Oh, right...
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:38:11 GMT -5
[Open the shot to the David O. McKay Center in Orem, Utah. The Utah Valley State College arena is packed with Wasatch Valley fans, signs wave, and the UVSC pep band finished up their pre-card hype, and What It Is to Burn by Finch blares over the PA system and the crowd ups the energy. There is a SWATron in one side of the gym, with a raised ramp along the aisle to the ring. The ropes are white with blue Japanese style pads with SWAT on opposing corners and ROCKIES down the other two corners in white. High above on a platform sit Rick Tilt Tilton and Vance Knox.]
Tilt: WELCOME TO MARCH TO THE SCAFFOLD!!!!
[CROWD POP~!]
Tilt: The World Champion Nick Collyer is in the house tonight and hell face off against Jay St. Clair for his twenty pounds of gold.
Vance Knox: Should be the only decent wrestling match on this card. What with the crap of the Scaffold Cage
its an abomination.
Tilt: Our other Co-Main Event uses that very device. Jack Kross and Killer have been at each other since before Rockies existed, and they get their big final showdown tonight inside the Scaffold Cage. Twenty feet of steel with extra footing at the top on the scaffolds. The winner has to get his opponent to say I Quit.
Vance Knox: And two chick fights. TWO!
Tilt: Thats true, our SWAT Womens champion Ms. Noriko teams with our new signee Keiko Nakamura to go against the unlikely duo of Alice and RIOT Watanabe. This came about after RIOT tried to interfere at Broken Hearts, and Keiko successfully did.
Vance Knox: And other two?
Tilt: Francesca Tansley and Jessica The Angel Helms both debut in SWAT tonight going head to head.
Vance Knox: We also have a gay and a preacher fighting for who is more clichéd.
Tilt: Bad Boy King Kong challenges The Reverend Cornelius Marsh for his King of the Deathmatch title. Kong trying to avenge his lovers loss at The Reverends hands.
Vance Knox: And the match Im looking forward to the most. Jace Mingla killing Trashcan Sam. But I have a question Tilt.
Tilt: And that is?
Vance Knox: Another dry campus? WHAT IS THE DEAL?
Tilt: We could be on BYU campus where caffeine is outlawed.
Vance Knox: Are you kidding me?
Tilt: No. Its the only place you can find Diet Caffeine Free Mountain Dew.
Vance Knox: I hate this place.
Tilt: Up first we have a fantastic four way tag in our suddenly large tag team division.
[Show shots of Red Day, Pimpin Crew, Shingo and Masato, and the William T. Jones Experience coming to the ring.]
Vance Knox: Damn that Sam Vane is the size of both Red Day members combined.
Tilt: Tipping the scales at 412, Vane is no joke.
[Paul Rotten of Red Day and Justin The Juice Majoy of Pimpin Crew start us off. They trade armdrags, and Juice suplexes him down floating over with a boston crab. Sid Rage breaks it up with a running bulldog, but gets caught with a superkick from Awesome Austin Rupp as he stands up, sending him over the top rope.]
Vance Knox: Austin celebrates, but Mad Tom Bonney grabs a handful of hair and drops him back with a reverse hairpull DeSkuller.
Tilt: Paul Rotten hits Bonney with a spinning Dragon Rana sending him into Shingo and Masatos corner.
Vance Knox: Sweet Dicks boys are the only team not to get any action in this match so far. They are probably picking their shots.
[El Oficial tries to get some semblance of order, indicating Paul Rotten and Juice to lock up again as the only legal men in the ring. Juice takes advantage and goes for an early FU on Paul Rotten, but Rotten floats off his back and looks for an RKO, but Majoy pushes him off into the ropes which Sam Vane pulls down sending Rotten sprawling hard to the floor. Vane takes that as a self tag in, and steps between the ropes
]
Tilt: The Juice looks overwhelmed at the mass of humanity in the ring with him.
Vance Knox: How many times are you going to say Juice in this match?
Tilt: As many as possible.
[Sam tells Majoy to bring it and Majoy hits the ropes running with a shoulder block bouncing himself off the massive Vane. Sam does a golf clap and tells him to try again, Majoy comes off the ropes again, but eats a Heartpunch for his troubles.]
Tilt: THE JUICE IS DEAD! That heartpunch stopped him faster than a Rosie ODonnell striptease.
Vance Knox: I think Majoy is having a seizure.
Tilt: Vane pulls him up and whips him off the ropes and bounces off the opposite ropes
VADER ATTACK!!
Vance Knox: I love that move.
[Majoy is limp on the mat, and Sam Vane raises his arms in victory but Paul Rotten and Sid Rage come off the top rope with a double dropkick that staggers Vane back where he trips over Majoy. Red Day each cradle a leg and go for a cover.]
El Oficial: 1
2
[Sam Vane kicks out sending both men backwards into the waiting arms of Shingo and Masato. Shingo brains Paul Rotten with an enzuigiri, and Masato dumps Sid Rage with a Cobra Clutch Suplex.]
Tilt: The Japanese contingency is in the ring.
[Shingo and Masato look at one another and nail double dropkicks to the knees of Sam Vane, Masato applies a Camel Clutch, and Sam starts to stand up, but Shingo blasts him in the face with a stiff Japanese dropkick. Mad Tom Bonney catches both Japenese stars with a moonsault, he then takes a Ghetto Knockout RKO from nowhere by Awesome Austin Rupp.]
Vance Knox: Does he know that ripping off the Smackdown Mainevent moveset isnt the best idea?
[Sid Rage grabs Austin Rupp with a Nothern Lights Suplex and flips over holding the bridge.]
Tilt: Sams back up.
[Sam Vane bounces off the ropes and drops with a massive body splash crushing both Sid Rage and Austin Rupp beneath him.]
Crowd: UUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
El Oficial: 1
2
[Shingo and Masato nail double jumping stomps to break up the cover.]
Tilt: Pier 6 brawl time!!!
[Indeed, Tom Bonney starts exchanging punches with Shingo as Masato gets some of Paul Rotten. Justin Majoy ambushes the rising Sam Vane and keeps on top of him with wild punches to the back of the head.]
Vance Knox: Its all broken down, and El Oficial is just letting it go.
Tilt: I guess this match just went Scramble.
Vance Knox: I suppose.
[Austin Rupp and Sid Rage are still laid out. Sam manages to get to a knee, and scoops Majoy up into a Bloody Driver.]
Tilt: Shingo just blasted Tom with a Rolling Wheel kick!
Vance Knox: Paul Rotten hits a stiff DDT on Masato snapping his body into an exclaimation point.
[Bloody Sam Vane grabs both Shingo and Pauls heads and holds a meeting of the minds, and then drags a nearly unconscious Justin Majoy up in a Full Nelson, shaking him back and forth. El Oficial checks to see if he is still conscious.]
Vance Knox: Masato locks the nearest body to him which happens to be Paul Rotten and locks him in a Bow and Arrow submission.
Tilt: A groggy Shingo drops a cannonball senton. HAMMER AND THE ANVIL!!!
Vance Knox: El O sees Masato with a dazed cover on Paul Rotten.
El Oficial: 1
2
3!!!!
Tilt: Shingo and Masato steal one from The William T. Jones Experience!!! Vane had that fullnelson slapped on, and The Hammer fell and the victory was snatched from his hands!!
Vance Knox: What in the hell
?
[Romantic Rights by Death From Above 1979 plays and the crowd goes berserk.]
Vance Knox: Werent the Kurtis Brothers supposed to be in this match?
Tilt: Oh yeah
they where. I wonder what happened to them?
[Show two men in wrestling tights wandering around in Wal-Mart.]
The Show Chad Kurtis: You are sure this is the address?
Big Daddy Matthew Kurtis: Yes, Chad. Now stop bitching and keep looking for the ring.
[Cue back to Tilt and Vance.]
Tilt: Up next our two debuting women, Angel and Fransceca Tansley.
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:38:31 GMT -5
Limo driver: Here you go ma'am. You requested to be driven here.
Jessica Helms looks over to the limo driver.
Jessica: Of course I did you baffoon! I mean honestly, when I give you instructions, you should follow it.
[Little did Jessica Helms know as she was speaking to the limo driver, a face from her past snuck up behind her, and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around and jumped.]
Jessica: Good God! What the hell are you doing here?
The cameras pan to Shane Michaels, new owner of Arizona Championship Wrestling AKA SWAT: Arizona, and the crowd screams and cheers in delight.
Shane: I suppose I could say the same to you.
Jessica gave him a look, as she took off her black Ray-Ban's.
Jessica: Don't ever question my judgement. I came here because I needed a change. What was your excuse?
Shane: I've been here a lot longer than you have missy.
Jessica clenched her teeth, and tried to compose herself.
Jessica: Look. Whatever happened between us in the past, it happened. The XGW has come and gone. You and I both went our own ways. But by the looks of things, you've done a lot better than I have since then.
Shane: Yeah, I heard about what happened to you. Poor poor Angel. Always getting the shitty end of the deal.
Jessica: Look, I'm trying to be reasonable with you.
Shane: Yeah? And how about all those times I tried to reason with you about things? But you never could see it my way could you? That's why you gave XGW to me! Because you couldn't HANDLE it.
[Jessica grew so angry she slapped Shane across the face. He just cocked his head back and laughed, as the crowd looked on in shock.]
Shane: Slap me all you want dear. I actually quite enjoyed that.
[Jessica put her head down and a smile came upon her face. She looked up at him again.]
Jessica: I'm here to focus on getting my hands on the Woman's Title. Is that too much to ask? And I didn't even think you were in the Rocky Mountains? I thought you were in the Carribean or some shit like that. What else would you like from me? You're already a Tag champion. You've got the XGW copyright. I didn't think you wanted anything else.
Shane: No, I don't. I'm actually here on business that doesnt concern you. And by the looks of things, you STILL haven't changed.
Jessica: What's that mean?
Shane: You know exactly what I mean. I still don't trust you.
Jessica: Well trust doesn't exactly take you very far nowadays, now does it?
Shane: No, it doesn't.
[The two of them looked straight into each other's eyes for a minute, as the crowd cheered. Then he walked away, and she only could watch him walk into the distance.]
Jessica (her voice being sarcastic) It was SO nice to see you again Shane! Take care love!
[She then whispered.]
Jessica: Moron. Now, I've got some real business to tend to. Time to take my career to the next step, I'm gonna try to hunt me down some gold tonight. Ms. Noriko, I'm coming for you.
[She laughed as she left the scene, and the scene faded to black.]
[The image backstage is settled on Jace and Madison. Jace is standing with his arms crossed, waiting to begin. The camera man gives him a signal from behind the camera and Jace smirks.]
Jace: Well, my first SWAT event has come and gone. The internet is all abuzz with my surprising performance. The newbie to SWAT, coming off an injury sustained in TKOW survives all the way to the final four of the biggest battle royale in wrestling history. I know this may be surprising to some
.but Im still not happy.
Madison (sarcastic): What?! YOU?! Not happy?!
Jace: No. In fact, Im pissed as hell. Because for every person with Jace Minglas name on their lips, there are three with Sly Fondells! That little pretty boy mother fucker
I havent seen such a shallow pathetic bag of shit in my entire life. That limp dick should just do us all a favor and deep throat a shotgun, but Im sure hes way too much of a pussy for that. He even had to resort to sneaking up on me while I was beating on Adam Haven to put me over the top rope. Well, let me say this, clear as day:
THERE IS NO WAY SLY FONDELL COULD TAKE ME ONE ON ONE.
Jace: Did you all catch that? No way in hell. In that, Im not just confident, Im POSITIVE. Im all too familiar with people like that. Arrogant
.obnoxious
.flitting from one self-absorbed ego trip to the next because hes so fucking insecure. Id stake some serious bank on the fact that he was probably morbidly obese as a kid and is now trying to overcompensate. Anyway, Im officially making an open challenge to Sly Fondell, championship belt or no championship belt. Anytime he wants to prove me wrong, Ill step in the ring with him. Anytime. He just needs to be prepared to accept the fact that Im going to prove that his win was a fluke.
Sly Fondell. I own you. You just dont realize it yet.
Madison: Oh! Oh! What about tonight?!
Jace (looking at Madison with bemusement): You are purposefully stirring the pot, arent you?
Madison: Hell yeah! Get pissed! I wanna see somebody get seriously fucked up tonight!
Jace: Oh, thats coming in spades. Because despite the fact that I threw so many people over the top rope at the pay per view and had the best showing in the match out of all the wrestlers in the Rocky Mountain Region, some other guy is getting a title match and Im stuck facing some buttfuck with a garbage man gimmick. I dont even know who this guy is. All I know is that Im gonna murder him tonight
but thats later. For right now, Im gonna go stick my foot up Isaac Blacks ass!
[Jace storms off camera with Madison in tow]
We come back to David O. McKay Center, Angel and Francesca Tansley both in the ring, Alice at the commentating booth with Tilt and Vance.
Tilt : So Alice, thanks for joining us.
The bell rings and the match gets under way, Francesca getting the early advantage with a couple of nice arm drags.
Alice : Pleasure to be here, gotta keep an eye on the new talent.
Vance Knox : Gotta try and get yourself some extra tv time more like it since dropping the Womens Belt.
Angel gets in some offence with a nice flying head scissors.
Vance Knox : I'll take one of those please!
Alice : Your sick!
Tansley with a hand full of hair gets back in control, holding onto the hair and bulldogging Angel. Tansley then covers, hooking the tights for good measure, getting a two count before Angel kicks out easily.
Alice : Doesn't mind bending the rules this Tansley tramp, does she?
Vance Knox : Tramp?
Angel snaps, she screams loudly, then tosses Tansley into the corner, flipping her off before she nails her with some corner punches.
Alice : Ohhh, the princess has a temper. Interesting.
Tilt : What exactly is this thing with you and her Alice?
Alice : Simple Rick, she comes here, to my town, no one knows her, never even heard of her, but she has the gaul to call me out, the at the time Womens Champ! How about working your way up the ladder lovie! And even worse then that, them Rowdy gooses give her a mock cheer, and she believes she has the support of the crowd.
Angel with a airplane spin into a stunner, the crowd go wild.
Tilt : Angel Special! Cover, 1 ... .2 ...... Francesca gets the shoulder up.
Vance Knox : You were saying Alice? Crowd really seem behind Angel to me.
Alice : Of course, now, this Tansley's breaking every rule in the book. They have to cheer for Angel.
Tansley with a rake of the eye's, then a side effect.
Alice : What did I tell ya! Look at the size of them nails, bigger then some of your parts, hey Vance.
Vance Knox : Thats sick, stop thinking about my manhood!
Tansley with a double handful of hair X Factor. She then hooks the leg of angle, nailing her with a Perfect Plex, bridging, giving the fans a great view ... of the action
Tilt : Bridge by Tansley, 1 ............ 2 .............. Angel rolls out of it.
Angel rolling out of the bridge, grabs the leg of Francesca and whacks on an Ankle Lock.
Alice : Angelic Lock! Impressive. For a whacko.
Tilt : Whacko?
Alice : Look at her out there, screaming and carrying on. Losing it. White Line Fever baby!
Tilt : She means business when she steps between the ropes all right.
Francesca reaching desperately for the ropes, she cant get there and instead clutches onto the referee's leg. The Ref tells her to get off, and this gives her enough time to drag herself to the bottom rope, breaking the hold.
Tilt : These two newcomers really giving it there all tonight.
Vance Knox : As well they should! They got Alice here to impress after all!
Chuckles at himself as Tansley drops Angel with a superkick. Francesca then signals its over, heads up the top ropes, setting herself for a moonsault, she launches, but misses.
Alice : Empty pool! Angel able to avoid that moonsault well.
Angel back to her feet, drills Tansley with a Gasno Bomb. Then covers.
Tilt : Angel Dream! The cover ... 1 ..... Tansley reaches for a foot on the ropes, but Angels got her in the middle of the ring ............. 2 ......... Francesca kicks out last possible second.
Alice : Great ring positioning and awareness there from Angel.
Tansley with a Frandango (Molly go Round) on Angel. Tansley then reaches into her red tang top and bulls out some sort of foreign object.
Alice : She doesn't give up, does she?
Tilt : The ref hasn't even seen this, what is that she has there. Hang on a sec, who's that?
Jeremiah Young charges down the rampway, jumps on the apron, yelling at the ref about the weapon, the ref tells him to beat it, and Tansley uses this time to go for it, swinging wildly at Angel, who ducks and plants Francesca with the Angelic Breaker (modified interverbreaker) and covers.
Tilt : Angel with the cover on Tansley .... 1 ................. 2 ..................... 3!!! She got it!
Alice : Well I'll be.
Vance Knox : So whats Young doing out here anyways?
Jeremiah Young jumps into the ring celebrating with Angel, Thrice "Silhouette" hits and he raises her arm in victory. |
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:39:09 GMT -5
[Cue up Isaac Black's office. Nothing too flashy, a black lacquered wooden desk with a monitor, and some papers on it. On the walls are posters of resent SWAT events, and some pictures of Isaac's tag teams he's managed. The Man himself is sitting behind his desk reading over what appears to be a contract.] Isaac Black: I can't believe the interns lost the announcement footage. I really got to crack down on those guys... [Suddenly, his door is thrown open. Jace and Madison storm in.] Isaac Black (sarcastically): Closed doors are usually an invitation to knock. [Madison, looking sexy as ever, sits right up on Isaacs desk. She grins at him, and its a weird combination of mirth and expectation. Jace stabs his finger in Isaacs direction.] Jace: What is this shit, Isaac? After my performance last night you should have been more than ready to bump me to main event status! Instead, Im curtain jerking with some jobber?! Isaac Black: Whoa, whoa, young fella, calm down. I was just about to have you paged. I needed to talk to you. There was a little mishap with an announcement that should have been made. I was going to reward the best representative of SWAT Rockies with the other slot in the Hardway Championship at SWATiversary. And guess what slick
thats you. [Jace looks somewhat satisfied with this announcement.] Jace: Good. Im glad youre seeing things my way. Isaac Black: I don't think so. This was in the cards before you chose to stick your foot in that door. Don't think that your madman techniques phase me, I've been around some of the most bizarre men in this sport. I won't cow-tow to anyone, I single-handedly ended Andrew Cicerelli's career with my silver tongue. I appreciate the aggression, the fire, that's just why I wanted you here in the Rockies, but don't try to strong arm me. It won't work. [Checks his watch.] Don't you have a match to get to? Jace: In time. But Im not done with you yet. [Isaac cocks an eyebrow as if to say, Oh, really?] Jace: Ill admit, you just got a modicum of respect from me just now. Few people have the balls to stand up to me. But in your case Im not quite sure if its because you really got the sack or your just ignorant of what I have done in the past
Isaac: What? You think I didnt know what I was getting into when I hired you? Mr. Mingla, Im well aware of the fact that you have more than a couple of screws loose, or at the very least you like to pretend you do. But the bullshit that worked in TKOW wont work here in SWAT, understand?! Im not some dumb ass blunt smoker. Im not some broad who can be pushed around. And Im not some schmuck who gave up on his company. Ive been around the block and Ive seen some shit that I think would surprise even you. So dont think you can come in here acting all hard and expect me to sit here, piss myself, and say Oh yes sir! Right away sir! [The tension in the room is palpable. Mingla and Black are outright glaring at each other now. Suddenly, Jace lashed out and strikes Black with a resounding slap! Black stumbles back, reeling from the surprise more than anything else.] Jace: Know your place, bitch. You have no idea the sheer level of pain and misery I can bring down on this company, you
or your family
[Isaac Black has completely lost it at this point! He lunges across his desk. Madison gives a delighted little shriek and hops out of the way, excited by the sudden violence. Jace wasnt expecting Black to attack him and they both tumble to the floor. Black pulls back and lands a stiff shot to Jaces mouth, drawing blood. Amindst the yelling, tumbling of furniture and struggling arena security come in to break them up. Both men are pulled to their feet, but they fight against the security. ] Isaac: Damn it! Dont you EVER touch me again!! Jace Mingla: Why?! What will you do? Fire me? Ill sue you for breach of contract!! Isaac: Fuck you! [Finally, Jace stops fighting back against the guards, and wipes the blood from his bottom lip. Gradually the guards let him go.] Jace: Like you said. I got a match. Lets go Madison. Madison (to Isaac): Love the suit, sweetheart. [Madison blows Isaac a kiss as she follows Jace out, leaving a fuming Isaac behind.] Tilt: I cant believe that!! Jace Mingla put his hands on Isaac Black!!! Vance Knox: Too bad CK wasnt back there. Id like to see him roughed up a bit. [We open to the backstage where a scraggly blonde man with a glazed over smile stands drinking a Sobe. His tattered jeans and faded Wrestlemania X T-shirt are covered in blood and dirt. His boots look cracked and worn, he is Trashcan Sam. A perky blonde in a burgundy peasant blouse and cream slacks stands next to him.] Jessika Holly Woods: Im backstage with one of our next competitors
Trashcan Sam. Now Sam you are facing Jace Mingla, a man who just found out that he is a challenger for the Hardway Championship
Trashcan Sam: Hold on theh Jessieh. Now you tellin me that if Id just gone in and yelled at Mr. Black Id get a title shot? Sounds fishy to me, although I did ask him for a quarter once and he gave me this job wrestlin. Hehehehehe. But on a serious note, right here in Orem, Uta
. JHW: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Tilt: The Dark Jester? Its Murphy Markus!!!
[The Demented Irishman lays down some stomps to the back of Sammys head, and then flips him over to a seated position, and bootscrapes the hell out of him. He then pulls some of the equipment thats sitting on the table next to him down on top of Sammy. Murphy turns to the Brad Chandler the sound guy his hoodie covering half his face
but the bottom is covered in red and black facepaint.]
Dark Jester: Hit my music
JHW: We need some help back here. Sammy
Sammy are you alright? Sammy?
#Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo#
[As the chords and percussions of Cypress Hill's 'Dust' crash over the speakers, an array of grey, red and white strobe lights scatter all over the ramp.]
#When people stare at the scene like a machine of the team
looking for theme between cracks searching for cream
physical image can never be lost
never be cleverly read or took on into the search of your own
suckers are looking for treasures and pleasures endeavours images of plastic
material whenever your ready your steady rolling with deadly and friendly
territorial glorious story you've heard nothing but bull for me#
[Out comes Murphy, whose hoody is covering the majority of his face from the crowd, he stands silently at the top of the ramp, over looking the crowd.]
#Coming from ghetto the güero the heart in the metal
settle for gas as we passing you fast in the pedal
head to the floor and the horror is starting to pour
everything I just threatened your blood you can't take it no more
why did you try to forget it I said it to FUCK OFF!!
now you'll be headed said I'm making you try to do laws
that's what you get for faking it hot and no more
living I'm sucker I'm pushing the bomb.#
[He begins to make his way towards the ring, not making any eye-contact with anyone, just staring at the ground ahead of him as he makes his way down to the ramp. Steam geysers up from either side of the ramp as he makes his way down it, as though following him.
Murphy finally makes it to the ring and hops up onto the apron, he turns to face the crowd and flips his hood down to finally reveal his face, doing a double cut-throat motion before turning and slingshotting himself into the ring.]
#Do what you want do what you need the hardcore
breaking the law the new seed yes they want more
Cypress Hill Soul Assassins we smokin 420 all day
we ain't joking serve it up oh yes and the hard stuff
excess of the zes make it sound right beat it up all you want
it's a damn right get up in my way I'll cross your ass like dust.#
[BOOM~!! Red pyro explodes from each corner of the ring as 'The Dark Jester' retreats to his corner to await the match bell.]
Tilt: It looks like Murphy Markus has booked himself in this match after taking out Traschcan Sam in the back.
Vance Knox: Shows initiative. Its better than half the locker room.
[The lights dim and turn to a cold blue as the opening chords to Marilyn Manson's "Personal Jesus" hits. Jace steps out from behind the curtain with Madison Dyson as his side. He heads straight for the ring with no wasted movement, getting right in the ring as Madison takes a place at ringside, jawing with the fans and shouting praise at Jace. Jace takes his gi top off and throws it over the top rope, sits back in the corner and stares bullets at Murphy Markus.]
Tilt: This should be an interesting match-up. Both men are shall we say mentally unstable?
Vance Knox: You mean they are ultra-violent whack jobs who get off on hurting people?
Tilt: Thats another way of putting it.
[El Oficial checks both men for weapons, and then calls for the bell
]
***DING DING DING***
[Both men circle each other, and Jace fires a couple of roundhouses keeping The Dark Jester at bay, Markus keeps his distance, but then suddenly rushes at Mingla with a stiff kitchen sink knee lift to the breadbasket and then a barrage of punches to the back of his head. Mingle tries to cover up, and gets to the ropes, but Markus doesnt stop until El Oficial backs him up.]
Tilt: Theres that explosive violence weve heard about from Murphy Markus
Vance Knox: The man is unhinged.
[El Oficial giving Markus a warning.]
Murphy Markus: FUCK YOUR BLOODY WARNINGS!!!
[Heel pop!]
Tilt: The Dark Jester bringing the naughty words to the table.
Vance Knox: He should be bringing the attention since Jace Mingla just blasted him with a spinning side heel kick to the face.
[Jester gets up holding his jaw and chuckling.]
Vance Knox: Is he laughing?
[Jace looks stunned and hits him with another spinning side heel kick, knocking The Dark Jester down. Markus just gets up chuckling more.]
Tilt: This is so bizarre.
[Mingla runs off the ropes and blasts Jester with a corkscrew roundhouse that snaps Markus head back and lays him out, but the Dark Jester just lays there and laughs.]
Vance Knox: That aint right. That aint right at all.
[Mingla pulls the Irishman up by the hair and starts laying in with some Kawada kicks, but Markus stands up and sweeps out his leg with a stiff STO, then he double armlocks Jaces arms while on their back and starts unleashing a melee of headbutts to Minglas unprotected face.]
Tilt: Oh my!!! Grounded trapped headbutts from Dublins own Murphy Markus.
Vance Knox: Dont you always want to call him Markus Murphy?
Tilt: As a matter of fact, I do.
[The Dark Jester stands up and lays in some heavy, heavy stomps as Ms. Madison Dyson screams at her man from ringside.]
Tilt: El Oficial telling Murphy to back off since Jace again manages to find himself entwined in the ropes.
[Madison rolls Jace outside and talks to him, trying to get him back into the match.]
Vance Knox: El Oficial is leaning over the ropes telling Dyson to get her man back in the ring
Tilt: HERE COMES JESTER!!!!
[Murphy Markus sprung off the opposite side ropes and cleared El Oficial with a huge leap and took out both Madison Dyson and Jace Mingla with a Tope Con Hilo with Mingla getting sent over the guardrail and The Dark Jester landing in the third row.]
Crowd: HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!!!
Tilt: Nothing like a Utah Fecal Chant.
Vance Knox: They landed in the Utah Special Olympics section! The Dee dee dees are freaking out!!!
Tilt: You caught Carlos Mencia last night too?
Vance Knox: Dee dee dee
[Both men get to their feet and start trading punches and chops. The Dark Jester with the former, Jace Mingla with the later.]
Tilt: Theyre brawling in the crowd!
Vance Knox: The Retards are all jumping around and punching each other and the competitors too! Its TARDFEST `06!!!!
[Finally the Special Olympics volunteers and Security clear an opening for Jace and Murphy to fight. Jace tosses a chair at Murphy who catches it, but counters the Van Daminator type kick by throwing the chair right back into Jaces face.]
Vance Knox: Why doesnt everyone do that? Or just knock the chair down?
Tilt: The Dark Jester with a swinging neckbreaker onto a scattering of chairs, he sets one up, and standing headscissors Jace.
[The crowd buzzes with anticipation.]
Vance Knox: Hes going to old school piledrive Jace right through that chair.
Tilt: Jace has been shot in the head in his past folks, any damage to the head hurts him quite a bit.
Vance Knox: Yes because normal men can have all their weight driven down onto their necks and be skipping around and singing merrily.
[Jace Mingla manages to counter the piledriver by back body dropping Murphy over the guardrail back into the ring area.]
Tilt: Jace saving himself there
he waits for The Dark Jester to get back to a vertical base, and drops him back down with a jumping Tornado DDT onto the concrete!!!
Crowd: HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!!!
Tilt: Remember that SWAT Rockies doesnt use outside mats.
Vance Knox: Or Pussy Pads as Jack Flack called them.
Tilt: You have to love our Head of Security.
[Mingla blasts a kneeling Jester in the face with a couple of chest kicks and then a Buzzsaw kick to the face.]
Vance Knox: That took off half of Jesters face! Literally!
Tilt: That face paint is cracking, and coming off quite a bit from this hard hitting contest. Im surprised that El Oficial is letting this go.
Vance Knox: Nah, he lets them fight.
[Jace drags Murphy to his feet, and rolls him up on the WCW style elevated entrance way. He follows him up and tries to hook him for a fisherman, but Jester punches out of it
.]
***SMACK!!!!****
[Jace with a chop.]
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
****SMACK***
[Murphy with a chop.]
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
***SMACK***
[Jace with a chop.]
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Tilt: A vicious exchange of chops.
Vance Knox: And The Dark Jester is loving it
hes laughing harder with every chop.
***SMACK***
[Murphy with a chop.]
***SMACK
SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK!!!***
Tilt: Murphy getting backed up near the ringside edge of the elevated rampway with a chop and flurry of kicks from Jace Mingla.
Vance Knox: Jace leaps
!!!!
***SMACK!!!!! THUD!!!!***
[CROWD POP!!!!]
Tilt: Jace Mingla just blasted The Dark Jester in the face with a jumping enzuigiri to the face that knocked the Demented Irishman all the way to the floor.
Rowdies: HES DEAD!!! HES DEAD!!! HES DEAD!!! HES DEAD!!! HES DEAD!!!! HES DEAD!!!
[Jace looks to his manager and then drops off the elevated entranceway with a legdrop. He holds his tailbone after he hits. Jester just lays there motionless.]
Vance Knox: Thats only a four foot drop, but to straight concrete on your coccyx.
Tilt: Both men showing what they can do for the Rockies crowd. Mingla is manages to get to his feet, and pulls Jester up rolling him into the ring.
Vance Knox: After about ten minutes of fighting on the floor we are back in the ring.
[Mingla whips Markus off the ropes, and chases with a clothesline, but Markus leaps and catches him flush on the chin with an Ultimate Jumping Knee Strike!]
Tilt: The Dark Jester just brained Mingla there! Mingla is laid out cold! That knee strike is an equalizer, we saw it just destroy Trashcan Sam in the back and now its laid out Jace Mingla.
Vance Knox: Jester is heading up top after dragging Minglas body near a corner.
Tilt: He could be looking for that Last Laugh moonsault double stomp the he likes to use as one of his finishers.
[Jester is poised on the top, when Trashcan Sam comes running out from the back yelling at Markus
Murphy looks at him and then leaps
]
Crowd: HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!!
Rowdies: THAT WAS AWESOME!!! *clap-clap-clapclapclap* THAT WAS AWESOME!!! *clap-clap-clapclapclap*
Tilt: Murphy Markus just leapt a good ten feet catching a running Trashcan Sam with a flying crossbody from the top onto the entrance ramp cutting off whatever Sam had in mind here.
Vance Knox: And most likely his mind was on revenge.
Tilt: The Dark Jester gets back in the ring and taunts Sammy a bit.
[Jace Mingla had staggered to his feet and half-nelsons Murphy Markus
.]
Vance Knox: Jester forgot who he was wrestling for a second
[
he spins him away from the ropes and folds him over with a Storm Cradle Driver
]
***BAM!!!!***
Tilt: MARTYR MAKER!!!
El Oficial: 1
2
3!!!!
[Personal Jesus by Marilyn Manson plays and Madison Dyson climbs up the ringsteps to celebrate with her man.]
Tilt: Jester was in control, but karma came and bit him on the ass. Trashcan Sam providing just enough distraction to cost Dark Jester his debut. |
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:40:16 GMT -5
Vance Knox: We have breaking news that Bad Boy King Kong and Cornelius Marsh are already fighting in the parking lot!!
[We cut to the outside camera where a circle of cars is empty.]
Tilt: Where are they?
[The camera pans around and sees two figures fighting right in the middle of a six lane road.]
Tilt: OH MY!!! Folks for those of you at home, the David O. McKay Center is near a freeway exit and Bad Boy and Marsh are brawling right in the center of that exchange!!!
[Marsh hits BBKK with a Russian legsweep onto a Miata.]
Vance Knox: Kong just crushed that random persons car.
Tilt: Mr. Black figured there might be some collateral damage and made the competitors sign a release. So the winner of the match is King of the Deathmatch, but the loser gets stuck with the bill for any property damage!!
[They finish crossing the street with Marsh yelling Jesus Loves You at all the cars blaring their horns at the two.]
Vance Knox: Marsh hooks Bad Boy with a crossarmed northernlights suplex! He must have Godlike strength to pick up the Fat Gay Ass.
Tilt: Was that just a hybrid insult?
Vance Knox: I believe it was.
[The film goes static.]
Tilt: Whats going on?
[He listens in his ear piece.]
Tilt: It seems that they are getting the camera crew to chase the two over, and are loading into a car well have a couple of minutes down time. So Vance what are your plans for the weekend?
Vance Knox: This is why I avoid you in the green room.
Tilt: I thought it was that you where allergic to my cat, but the monitors out here blocked the dander.
Vance Knox: Oh yeah
like I wasnt lying.
Tilt [wiping a tear away.]: Theyve found them in the parking lot of Wal-Mart across the street!
[BBKK has Marsh up on his shoulder standing on top of a Ford F-150. He powerslams him into the bed of the truck!]
Tilt: Marshs back is arched in pain, that bed wasnt empty folks
Vance Knox: Not at all it was full of some hillbillies empty beer cans.
Tilt: The Reverend climbs out the edge of the truck but his suit is torn up from the aluminum. Here comes Kong!!!
[BBKK just avalanches Marsh and then starts humping his butt over and over against the side of the F-150.]
Vance Knox: Bad Boy King Kong is dry-humping the Reverend in the parking lot of Wal Mart!!!
Tilt: Just like many Utah teens Saturday nights. This move should be called the Kanab Prom Date.
Vance Knox: So you even half-ass going all the way?
Tilt: Kong sees a slurpee machine inside the Wal-Mart and drags Cornelius along with him.
Vance Knox: Big man, Big Thirst.
[Kong orders a White Cherry Slurpee while rabbit punching Marsh in the side of the head, the girl behind the counter hands Kong his Slurpee but Marsh slaps it out of his hand and staggers away as Kong drops down to lick Slurpee off the floor.]
Tilt: This is sick
Vance Knox: And we just saw simulated love-me-some-fruit-loops a few minutes ago.
[BBKK finishes what he can, but stares bullets at Cornelius Marsh who is hitting up an elderly lady for a Donation while she dines on pretzel and cheese.]
Tilt: Kong rushes Marsh, but Marsh drop toe holds the big man right on top of that elderly lady.
[Kongs head lands right in her lap, and she gets a weird smile on her face. The crowd groans at what they are witnessing.]
Vance Knox: I think Im going to be sick.
Tilt: Marsh stops the horrid sight by breaking one of the nearby McDonalds chairs across Kongs back and then he smashes Mr. Computer with the same chair.
Vance Knox: How did Mr. Computer get there?
Tilt: Its the mystery of Mr. Computer.
[Marsh rains down a flurry of punches to BBKKs head and then leverages him over with a monkey flip into another table.]
Tilt: That table was bolted to the floor and Kong just popped it right out of its hinges.
[Marsh sees a couple of cross-eyed overweight female on lookers and slaps them on their forehead, straightening out their eyes and then petitions for money.]
Vance Knox: Marsh taking time to heal inbred bitches!!
[One of the girls starts to lift her shirt
]
Tilt: Oh no
one of them thinks that this is Girls Gone Wild!!!!
[Just before the fat bitch can show her sag-bags BBKK splashes her and Marsh with a Vader Attack.]
[FACE POP!!!!]
Vance Knox: Its the first time ever that Bad Boy King Kong has gotten a positive reaction from a crowd.
[Kong then proceeds to take off his shirt and show his man boobs.]
[HEEL HEAT!!!!!!]
Tilt: And back to the Kong San Francisco loves.
Vance Knox: Marsh pops him in his Lil Kongs with a boot
Tilt: He then pumphandles and muscles him over into a spinebuster.
[He makes the cover.]
Vance Knox: There is nobody to count? We got a crew over there without a referee?
Tilt: Marsh stops a pimply faced worker and tells him to count.
Wal-Mart Employee Jon: 1
2
[BBKK kicks out.]
Tilt: And we are still going!! Marsh stands up and gives Kong a couple of solid whacks on the back, but the Big Man from the Smokey Mountains just bulldozes Marsh back through the ladies department finally stopping with a crash through the bra display.
[Kong reaches over and grabs a black bra and holds it up to his chest.]
Vance Knox: And this match is slowly becoming the most visually disturbing match in Rockies history.
[Marsh quickly unburies himself and heads off towards the hardware section.]
Tilt: Marsh is going someplace.
[Marsh stops and looks around. He stops an employee.]
Cornelius Marsh: Wheres hardware?
Employee: I dunno. Its not my department.
Wal-Mart Employee Jon: Its in the back corner.
[Marsh nods and pushes his way past a couple of Emo kids. His suit now soaked with sweat and the sleeves torn and battered. Kong starts following the black bra now around his massive chest.]
Bad Boy King Kong: How does it look Reverend? Reverend? Now where did he go?
[We follow Kong down an aisle way where he gets blasted with a wrench set to the face.]
Tilt: KONG IS DOWN!!! He dropped like the Worlds Biggest Sack of Potatoes.
Vance Knox: Hey, how much is that wrench set?
Tilt: 17.99 for a 50 piece looks like.
Vance Knox: Cheap imitation steel no doubt.
[Marsh grabs a nearby ladder and opens it up. He then opens up the wrench set dumping them out all over BBKK. Marsh climbs up top and leaps off with a frog splash from the second highest rung.]
Tilt: You arent supposed to step on that one!
Vance Knox: You are such a wiener.
Wal-Mart Employee Jon:1
2
3!!!
Tilt: Marsh retains in a bloody brawl all through Wal-Mart and across streets!
Vance Knox: And Kong gets stuck with the bill!!!
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:40:53 GMT -5
Tilt: We already have our ladies in the ring for the tag team bout.
Vance Knox: We running long?
Tilt: Well we do have to account for set-up time for the Scaffold Cage.
Vance Knox: Ah.
[Ben Hernandez calls for the bell.]
***DING DING DING***
Tilt: Alice and Keiko Nakamura start off this bout.
Vance Knox: Nakamura with a solid showing in Divas Unleashed in Vienna.
Tilt: As did RIOT Watanabe.
[Alice chops Keiko across the chest, and Keiko returns the favor, and then quickly whips her off the ropes catching her with a satellite Tornado DDT.]
Tilt: The former womens champion is down. Keiko picks Alice up and drops her with a stalled fishermans suplex, and then starts to swing her around and around in a Giant Swing.
Vance Knox: The essence of womens wrestling. Make your opponent dizzy by spinning them around. The Airplane Spin and the Giant Swing. Se magifique!
[Keiko slows her spin and then flips over into a Boston Crab. RIOT comes into the ring and drops a legdrop on Alices neck.]
Tilt: Hey!! Thats her partner!
[Keiko yells at Noriko to come and join in. Motioning with one hand, and switching to a single leg crab.]
Tilt: Noriko comes in and knocks RIOT off with a dropkick, and starts yelling at Nakamura.
[The two exchange words in Japanese, Keiko asking why she didnt join in, and Noriko shaking her head and saying something about honor. RIOT then pushes Noriko from behind banging her head with Keikos, and Keiko fires back with a chop to Norikos chest sending her back into a backdrop driver from RIOT. Alice then clocks RIOT from behind with a steel chair and Ben Hernandez calls for the bell. Keiko dropkicks the chair into Alices face.]
Al Sharp: This match as been declared a No Contest.
[Keiko stands alone in the ring but Francesca Tansley catches her off guard with a Frandango, and Angel gets her some by dropping Fran with an Angelic Wings onto the steel chair that Alice brought into the ring.]
Tilt: Six women are in the ring, most of them laid out!!! Jessica Helms is the last woman standing!
[The scene opens up to a SWAT: Rockies background with The Anarchist and his manager, the ever-loving, everlasting Paul Allen already occupying the front. Paul is donned in regular business attire whereas Jay seems ready to go with a bare chest and Metallic Blue vinyl pants.]
JSC: Well here we are, back in Utah. Heh, home of my beloved Jazz.
[After a brief pause, both men share a short outburst of laughter before Jay continues.]
JSC: No but seriously, Utah, the place where I will cement my legacy here in Syndicate Wrestling and Tradition. The place where I will make history as the youngest SWAT World Heavyweight Champion, not to mention the first ever Chicagoan to hold that title. And finally, the place where I prove that I am the embodiment of miraculous victories. Ysee, my short climb to the top all started some 5 months ago in the tournament to crown the first ever SWAT World Deathmatch champion. Going into that match all I heard was about how I couldnt win it because I wasnt HARDKORE~!111!1 enough. And yeah I didnt win, but I sure as hell opened up eyes. I made the Hardcore Legend Kilroy Evans himself notice me, and that was my first step towards superstardom.
Next, I took out the likes of Bad Boy King Kong, the Kurtis Brothers, JW Madison and Alexander Delvecchio and reached the zenith of the Rockies division. Too bad I couldnt capture the following opportunities and win myself the World Heavyweight Championship
but all that changes tonight. Tonight, I am walking into the David O. McKay Center a complete and utterly focused man targeting nothing else, but the gold itself. Nick Collyer, I know I said some disrespectful things about you in my last promotional, but all jokes aside man, I respect you. I respect what you did to Stan Wilson at New Years Nightmare, I sure as hell respect your wrestling ability, your love for the business, and your true fighting spirit. But none of those special traits and characteristics are going to help your chances tonight when you step into the ring with me. I understand that you want to write another chapter about a successful title defense in Utah, but that chapter is going to list you as nothing but a loser, and your book about How to be a successful World Champion will end there. Well maybe not end completely, but rip out the pages, and change the authors name to yours truly and voila! A true book about being a world champion.
JSC pauses and breathes a long sigh of anticipation mixed in with some anxiety.
JSC: Nothing against you Collyer, but you have to know that somewhere in the outer dimension, a virtual Pandoras Box of mayhem, and agony, and chaos, and calamity was opened the second my name was signed to this very World Championship match. Tonight, Im going to bust out all the mod cons, and then I look forward to beating you in your very game. Dont underestimate me tonight Collyer, tonight is quite possibly the worst of all nights to be taking someone with a mindset and a game plan like mine lightly. I'm going to try it all with you tonight. Ill be giving that so-called Death Style of yours a try, and then Ill be the man to tour the world making a name for myself while at the same time, adding more prestige and glory to the title. And Sly Fondell, you better get ready for a goddamn war.
Like I said earlier, destiny aint got shit on me tonight.
JSC then walks off, looking as pumped and ready as ever. However, Paul Allen stays back and decides to add in a few words of his own.
Paul Allen: Nick Collyer my friend, if you thought those wars with Stan Wilson and David Sadler were grueling and punishing, then you sure as hell havent recognized the true meaning of pain and punishment son. Tonight, you are stepping into the ring with a man who is so close to becoming what you already are, that its going to take all of those submissions, suplexes, weapons, and head drops mixed in with a divine prayer to stop him tonight. And thats if you get lucky. A lot has been said tonight, but I feel the need to top it all off with a great saying.
In the immortal words of Jim Cornette, Nick Collyer, get ready for SHOCK and AWE!
Paul Allen lets out a laugh before following The Anarchist and disappearing out of view as the scene cuts to somewhere else.
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:41:35 GMT -5
[We open to Nick Collyer wearing a T-shirt that reads, MARK OUT OR DIE!!!! The crowd goes bonkers. Nick is just finishing lacing up his boots, and adjusts the kneepads to where he likes them. A frustrated Jessika Holly Woods comes on screen.]
JHW: I was blown off in my last interview, but do you have some words Champ?
[Nick Collyer looks Jessika straight in the eye, and cracks a half-smile.]
Nick Collyer: I got a million of them, Holl. But tonight I let my actions do the talking. Tonight we see what Jay St. Clair is made of as he faces the best in the world today. Tonight we see that Jay shouldnt have gotten this match, that he had two drinks at the fountain of opportunity already and squandered them.
This isnt a gift Jay. This is a punishment laid down by Isaac Black for misrepresenting your region. You are going to learn a lesson tonight Jay, a lesson of respect, and honor.
You want me to get ready for Shock and Awe? I say get ready for a Straight Edge Revolution.
Im done talking Holly. Its fighty time.
[Nick grabs his Kendo stick and heads to the ring.
We cut to the ringside area, and the fans are going crazy. A sign in the crowd reads xXx on it, and another reads JAY IS MY SAINT!]
Tilt: Here we go!!! Part of Nick Collyers whirlwind tour starts here in the Rockies against Jay St. Clair.
Vance Knox: Jay claims that he had a body double stand in for him at the last two pay per views, not a smart move when you had guaranteed title shots on the line.
Tilt: Yet Isaac Black thinks that Jay has the stuff to put on a great show with Nick Collyer here tonight, and he gets the call.
[The lights dim down as a faint voice sings the opening lyrics of Dead and Bloated]
I am smellin like the rose
That somebody gave me on
My birthday deathbed
I am smellin like the rose
That somebody gave me
cause Im dead & bloated
[With that, the song picks up and the lights return to normal as smoke starts to gather around the entranceway. Then out steps Jay St. Clair with his hands raised above his head flat against each other in typical Indian fashion. He sports his favourite silk robe running down to his ankles along with the vinyl pants differing in colour each time. Ray-Ban shades are covering his eyes as the NAW Television championship is securely strapped around his waist.]
I am smellin like the rose
That somebody gave me on
My birthday deathbed
I am smellin like the rose
That somebody gave me
cause Im dead & bloated
[Jay begins to strut down the ramp trying to avoid all contact with the fans. On the SWATtron, several clips of Jay in action are shown. Firstly, Jay is shown drilling Angelica with the Cataclysm on a steel chair in his debut match. Next up is a clip from SWAT as Jay locks in the Koji Clutch and knocks out Jack Flack unconscious. After that, Jay is shown executing a Crippled Hopes Backbreaker on Alexander Delvechio.]
Ohh yeah, and she says its natural
I feel Ive come of age
When she peeks I start to run
Ohh yeah, and she says its natural
I feel Ive come of age
When she peeks I start to run
[Jay takes a trip around the ringside area laughing at how the fans cuss at him. He spots an attractive female member in the crowd and goes over as she plays Hard-to-get. On the big screen, some more clips are shown of Jay with the NAW TV title over his shoulder. Next up is a clip of some hot blonde sitting on his lap and kissing him on his neck. After that, Jay is shown stealing Kilroy Evans trademark Big Boot to the head.]
You cant swallow what Im thinkin
You cant swallow what Im thinkin
[Jay climbs the apron and un-straps the Television Championship from his waist as he climbs the turnbuckle from outside the ring and raises it high in the air (ala The Rock). The final clip on the SWATtron is of the career ending Windy City Cutter from the top rope that Jay St. Clair gave to Bad Boy King Kong with several Singapore canes placed on BBKK's back]
I am trampled under sole of
Another mans shoes
Guess I walked too softly
[JSC then removes his robe and hands it off to his entourage as he prepares for his opponent by doing some stretches.]
Vance Knox: Jay representing NAW with the TV title here. Isaac likes to bring in guys from lots of different federations to get differing styles.
Tilt: Thats what makes SWAT Rockies one of the hottest wrestling promotions in the world today Vance.
[Where Eagles Dare by the Misfits kicks in. The crowd goes crazy.]
#We walk the streets at night
We go where eagles dare#
[The tip of a Singapore Cane pokes out from the curtains.]
#They pick up every movement
They pick up every loser
With jaded eyes and features
You think they really care#
[The cane snaps the curtains back, and Nick Collyer steps out holding the cane aloft, the Syndicate Wrestling and Tradition World Title firmly around his waist. Clips appear on the SWATron of Nick hitting the Urban Legend on Dan Stein, and locking Dave Sadler down with the Minor Threat.]
#I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby
I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby, babe#
[Nick walks up the stairs and climbs the turnbuckle, standing with one foot on the top rope, one on the outside, pointing at the fans with the edge of the cane. Shots of Nick diving out on Legion X, and fighting Stan Wilson are shown.]
#An omelet of disease awaits your noontime meal
Her mouth of germicide seducing all your glands#
#I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby
I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby, babe#
[Nick jumps into the ring, and sets his Singapore Cane on the outside of his corner. He takes off the World Title and hands it to the referee.]
#Lets test your threshold of pain
Lets see how long you last
Thats happened in your love-me-some-fruit-loops
On bosoms of your past#
[Nick checks the tension on the ropes, and then checks his wrist taping. He drops his head, and waits for the referee to check his boots and gear.]
#With jaded eyes and features
You think they really care
Lets go where eagles dare
Well go where eagles dare#
[The infamous Anderson throat slit motion, and a sardonic smile from the Future of Hardcore, as the music fades in the last chorus.]
#I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby
I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby
I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby
I aint no goddamn son of a bitch
You better think about it baby, hey#
Vance Knox: Nick Collyer a Bad Karma Dojo graduate, a disciple of Cyrus Williams in wrestling style and long ass ring entrances.
Tilt: Hey we pay the royalties, we might as well hear the whole song.
Al Sharp: The following contest is the first of your Co-Main Events and is for the SWAT WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!!! Your referee for this match is Alicia Moore.
[HUGE CROWD POP!!!]
Al Sharp: Introducing first the challenger to my left in black and white, standing in the ring at six feet four inches tall and weighing in at two hundred and forty-five pounds. THE ANARCHIST
JAYYYYY ST. CLAIIIIRRR!!!
Tilt: St. Clair might have been AWOL for awhile, but he looks focused and ready for this match-up.
Vance Knox: If isnt focused for this match he needs to hang up the boots right now.
Al Sharp: And to my right in black and gold, standing six feet even and weighing two hundred and thirty four pounds, hailing from Bakersfield, California he is the SWAT WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, he is NICK COLLYERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Vance Knox: Normally I bitch about everything, but I like the boxing style introductions for this match.
Tilt: Alicia calls for the bell and this match is underway!!!
***DING DING DING***
Tilt: Both men just feeling the other out right now. Neither man has competed against the other before. Nobody wants to make a mistake early on.
[The two circle each other and lock-up. Collar and Elbow. Jay uses his height advantage to push Nick back into a neutral corner. Alicia calls for a break, and Jay lets up with a smile.]
Tilt: Nice clean break there
SMACK!!!!!
Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
Vance Knox: Or not.
Tilt: Jay St. Clair just slapped the taste right out of Nick Collyers mouth.
[Nick checks his jaw, and then fires a European uppercut right to JSCs face. He hits another, and then follows with a Roaring Elbow that sends Jay to the mat. St. Clair rolls out of the ring and tries to clear the cobwebs. Some of his entourage gather around him to lend support.]
Vance Knox: Jay taking a breather here. I might not like Nick Collyer but I know you shouldnt try to get into a strike fight with him.
Tilt: It might not be much of a breather after all. Nick Collyer runs to the nearest corner, leaps up and jumps off with a moonsault onto Jay St. Clair and his group sending all of them sprawling over the David O. McKay Center floor.
Crowd: NICK!! NICK!!! NICK!!! NICK!!! NICK!!! NICK!!!
[Collyer grabs Jay by the back of the head, and rolls him back into the ring. He grabs Jays wrist and slaps on a short arm scissors, bending Jays wrist back on itself.]
Tilt: Nick going to one of his bread and butter moves, working the arm and shoulders.
Vance Knox: Jay spins a little and gets his foot under the ropes however.
Tilt: Nick with a clean break, and lets Jay get to a vertical base, but then Nick lunges forward with a single leg takedown, and quickly tries to flip Jay onto his stomach with a Single Leg Crab.
Vance Knox: Nick was an All-State California wrestler, not a lot of people remember that since he is such a striker now.
Tilt: Jay still not all the way over, and is still fighting the crab. I think Jay was expecting Nick to come out with a load of heavy strikes, but Nick is going the more technical route tonight.
[Jay scrambles and manages to move closer to the ropes, and gets his hand on the bottom rope. Nick lets go on Alicia Moores command, and spins around waiting for JSC to rise.]
Tilt: I doubt that Jay is going to leave his leg that open again this time.
[Jay gets to one knee, and tells Alicia to back Nick off.]
Vance Knox: Best move right there, force the ref to do your bidding. Get some space, Collyer has to be in close to do most of his damage.
[Jay finally gets all the way standing and tries to work out his arm a little. Nick lunges at the knee again, but Jay quickly sidesteps him and backs up.]
Tilt: We have a little Pride Fighting feel right now, a nice bit of Cat and Mouse.
Vance Knox: St. Clair motioning that he wants another collar and elbow.
Tilt: Collyer happy to oblige, Jay slides this one quickly into a hammerlock, and then to a side headlock.
[Nick fires some shots to the ribs, trying to break the headlock, but JSC holds firm.]
Vance Knox: Now Nick trying to get leverage to force the headlock up and over. He slips out!!!
Tilt: Hes starting to turn the headlock! I think Jays arm is still a little weak from that armscissors placed on it earlier.
[Jay lets the wristlock go, grabs Nicks head in an inverted headlock and drops him crooked across his back.]
Tilt: Old School Randy Orton style backbreaker out of nowhere!!! Nick seemed like he was turning the lock to his advantage and The Anarchist just busted a side backbreaker out.
Crowd: WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Vance Knox: Jay doesnt let up either, locking on a half-nelson and slamming the Champ down across his knee. He holds him there and pushes down on his neck, bending him backwards.
Tilt: Nick is bent in ways that God didnt intend man to be bent.
[Jay grabs Nicks wrist and pulls him up, standing behind him and drops him head first in a spinning backdrop suplex. He then rolls Nick to his stomach and pulls back on a chinlock while kneeling on Nicks spine.]
Tilt: Jays found an opening and hes not going to let up on it.
Vance Knox: Would you? Nick is known for working up to serious suplexes later on, Jays cutting that off at the pass.
Tilt: Indeed he is, Jay lets up on the rear chinlock, and just lays some boots to Nicks back and then drops an elbow right to the spine.
Vance Knox: Jay whips Nick off the ropes and catches him coming back in an abdominal stretch.
Tilt: His height advantage really allowing him to open up the ribcage and torque the spine.
[JSC pushes down on Nicks head to twist him horribly. Jay then quickly picks Nick up and drops him haphazardly across his knee again.]
Vance Knox: Modified pumphandle backbreaker there. Jay thinks it might be enough and goes for a cover.
Alicia Moore: 1
2
[Nick Collyer kicks out.]
Tilt: Jay St. Clair whips Nick Collyer into a corner and then sets him up on the top rope, he Samoan Drops him from there!!!
Vance Knox: Nick arching his back in pain, and Jay rolls him over for a pin.
Alicia Moore: 1
2
[Nick kicks out, but rolls over at the same time reversing the pinfall to his advantage.
CROWD POP!!!]
Alicia Moore: 1
.
2
.
[Jay St. Clair kicks out.]
Tilt: Nick Collyer has that kickout to a pinfall counter that was first displayed by Teddy Hart, it almost caught Jay St. Clair for the pin right there.
Vance Knox: Jay once again sets Nick up on the top rope, this time facing out to the crowd.
[Jay pulls Nick back like hes in the tree of woe, but has him in a modified torture rack out of the corner. Alicia is making the five count, but Jay lets him drop and hang in the tree of woe after 4.]
Tilt: Such innovation by Jay St. Clair here, now hes slides outside and is pulling back on Nick Collyers neck, stretching the back and neck even further Alicia is counting again since Nick is tied up in the ropes.
Vance Knox: Im impressed, with the exception of a little bit of offence in the beginning, Jay St. Clair is being fairly dominant in this World Title match. The time off really helped his game.
[Alicia tries to untie Nick from the tree of woe, as Jay slides back into the ring. Jay pulls Alicia back, and locks Nick in an inverted facelock. He then jerks backwards hard, releasing Nicks legs and dumps him neck first across his knee with an inverted DDT.
INNOVATION POP!!!]
Tilt: Whoa!! Jay St. Clair just gator-bustered Nick Collyer out of the tree of woe.
Vance Knox: And keeps Alicia off his sack for Nick being in the ropes.
Tilt: He goes for a cover.
Alicia Moore: 1
2
[Nick Collyer kicks out.]
Tilt: The Champion just wont go down.
Vance Knox: Jay double chickenwings the arms
he might be looking for his new submission the Butterfly Effect, hes trying to spin Nick to his stomach
Tilt: Nick Collyer used to have a Cattle Mutilation variant in his arsenal, so he should know some counters
[Nick stomps down hard on Jays foot releasing the double chickenwing, he then throws a monster back elbow smash and leaps with a Dying Sickle timed enzugiri knocking Jay St. Clair for a loop.]
Tilt: And just like that The Future of Hardcore turns the tables. Those strikes are deadly.
Vance Knox: Both men are sprawled on the mat, Nicks taken most of the damage, but Jay has spent a lot of energy coming up with new ways to wear Nick Collyer down.
[Both men start to get to their feet, and Jay throws a punch at Nick, who grabs his arm and forces him down with a Fujiwara armbar, but bends it, and traps it with his legs, and applies a chinlock.]
Tilt: Kimura Lock II!!! Jay St. Clair is in the center of the ring. Nick is really cranking back on the chinlock while holding that Kimura with his legs.
Vance Knox: WORKED SHOOT !!! WORKED SHOOT!!!
Tilt: Jay St. Clair makes his way to the ropes
hes almost there, but Nick lets the hold go, flashes over to the leg that is closest to the ropes wraps it up in a spinning toe hold
Rowdies: TERRY!!!! TERRY!!!! TERRY!!!! TERRY!!!!
Tilt:
but then spins back the other way, trapping the knee with his legs and reaches down grabbing the Jays arm an applying a cross-armbreaker. The Kudo Clutch!!! Nicks been searching for more moves and this modified legbar cross-armbreaker is something out of a carwreck.
Vance Knox: St. Clair might be double jointed but hell have to be triple jointed to get out of this.
Tilt: Nick lays back torquing the arm and the knee of Jay St. Clair at the same time. Nick shifts his weight and that allows Jay to slip his leg out from that torturous hold, but he is still in a cross-armbreaker.
Vance Knox: This match might not be all over the place with brawling, but America this is mat wrestling
[Suddenly gold and silver pyro goes off from the stage, and the SWATron reads. PWI says, SLY FONDELL HAS THE GREATEST SUPLEXES IN THE BUSINESS TODAY.]
Tilt: What in the world was that? Sly Fondells colors shoot off, and a PWI quote?
Vance Knox: It got Nick Collyer to release the cross-armbreaker though.
Tilt: Nick is staring at the writing on the Tron, and doesnt see Jay come up from behind him with a school boy!!!
Alicia Moore:1
2
[Nick kicks out, but shifts his weight catching Jays arm, and floats over into an inverted cross-armbreaker where Jay is flat on his stomach as Nick pulls up and out on his arm.]
Tilt: That message is still on the Tron.
Vance Knox: Nick lets go of the armbreaker again, and is yelling at the screen. Jay St. Clair again comes up behind Nick Collyer and this time dumps him with a German suplex
BAM!!!
Crowd: ONE!!!!!
Tilt: The St. Clair Series!!!
BAM!!!!
Crowd: TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Nick grabs Jays wrist, pushes down as he is being lifted up for the third german and twists out into a Single Arm DDT Jay St. Clair landing flush on his neck.]
Tilt: St. Clair gets reversed!!! Nick Collyer just countered that last German into a single arm DDT and St. Clair is face first on the mat.
[Nick picks a deadweight JSC up and hooks a half-nelson and grabs his own wrist
BAM!!!!!]
Tilt: BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON SUPLEX!!!!
Vance Knox: He bridges!!!
Alicia Moore: 1
2
.
3!!!!!!!!!
Tilt: Nick Collyer wins this match, but Jay St. Clair showed us something special tonight. He gave Nick a run for his money, and was definitely the toughest test for the Champ tonight.
Vance Knox: That counter out of the German Suplex looked like it knocked Jay St. Clair out cold. Nick had to deadlift him over for that Blue Eyes White Dragon.
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Post by SWAT eFed on Sept 20, 2021 3:42:33 GMT -5
(Cameras go in and out of locker rooms one stops at Kross's locker room and sees him taping his wrist and watching a video. The camera gets closer and see's he is watching his matchs with Killer. Kross looks up and talks.) Kross: You would be surprised by what you can learn by watching these things. Moves that people go for, weak spots, multiple things. Here in about 5 minutes I am gonna walk to the stage and make my grand entrance. Then Killer is gonna come out and then we will be in match 5. Match 5 will be one to remember a scaffold cage match. Killer ever since this fued started each match has gotten worse and worse. So a word of advice to you is to walk away. Because I thrive on the pain and suffering of others and if you stay in the little series we are having you will be hurt permantly. And I will be the one to do it. (Kross stands up and puts something in his pockets.) Kross: Well here we go. (Kross walks toward the stage area as Suicide Messiah blares over the arena Kross steps out into center stage..... [The David O. McKay Center is rocking after the intermission to set up the final match of the night. The Scaffold Cage is erect, a standard chain link mesh cage surrounded with scaffolding on the outside of all four walls. There is one door on the ramp way with a bridge over the top of it. Al Sharp stands in the middle of the ring dressed in a Tuxedo, the microphone descends from aloft, and he catches it.] Al Sharp: And for our final bout of the evening, the Fifth Installation of the Best of Five Series to determine the other half of the Hardway Championship. This is a Scaffold Cage I Quit Match! [HUGE POP~!] Tilt: Its time for this to end. Vance Knox: You are telling me. This card has gone on way too long. Tilt: You are a wrestler, you should look at this card with high esteem. Vance Knox: A Reverend and a Fat Guy beat each other senseless in a Wal-Mart, the womens match degraded into a Pier 6 Brawl, and lets not even mention that spotfest of an opener we had. Tilt: But the World Title Match
Vance Knox: Made it tolerable. [We cut backstage to Jessika Holly Woods.] JHW: Im here waiting for Killer to get some words. [Killer walks out from a dressing room, and just blows by Jessika whose mouth hangs open mid-question.] Tilt: Killer just blew Holly off. Vance Knox: Usually its Holly blowing people off. Tilt: VANCE!! Vance Knox: What? [The Lights go out as "Godzilla Intro" plays for a few seconds before going into "This Means War" by the Ozzy and Busta Rhymes hits as Killer appears. He cracks his knuckles than rubs his wrist as the fans cheer. He makes his way to the ring and enters waiting his opponent. He stares up at the Scaffold twenty feet above him, and has a hard stare under his mask.] Al Sharp: In the ring, standing six feet five weighing in tonight at three hundred and ten pounds he is the Master of the Killmission. KILLER!!! [The crowd goes crazy, as Killer raises his hand. Walk by Pantera hits and Jack Kross makes his way to the Cage wearing a black T-shirt reading Death is all that separates us from the Animals on the front So what makes you think that you can beat me? on the back. He stops at the entranceway and paces back and forth.] Kross: I have seen alot of things in my life. Done alot of things in the wrestling world. But, last week Killer said something to me that hit home. He said I should just quit. [Crowd pop.] Well Killer I am gonna quit.
But not wrestling you see you were right there is a little voice down in my gut that keeps telling me to quit being this pushover and take the spotlight that I deserve. I lay awake at night trying to keep this pent up demon from unleashing hell upon the Rockies roster. But, after I heard those words I quit come from you mouth Killer I couldnt stop it anymore.
(Kross walks about the ring and then continues.)
Kross: You see you can say you were trained by Animal and Hawk all you want but the fact of the matter was you learnt all your moves from Bert and Ernie. Thats right the truth is out Killer learned to wrestle from to guys who slept in the same bed together. So to say that I should quit is just worng. Because wither you like it or not I am up one match baby. This scaffold/I quit match will be a walk in the park for me. And when I see you fall all the way to mat from the scaffold only then will you realize you arent facing the old Jack Kross no no your facing the new, the improved, "The Suicide Messiah" Jack Kross.
[Huge heat as Kross drops the mic, and sprints to the ring.]
Al Sharp: And his opponent standing six feet six and weight two hundred sixty five pounds, this is JACK KROSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!
[Ben Hernandez has a wireless mic in hand, and waits for Al to leave the ring, then he padlocks the cage and calls for the bell.]
***Ding Ding Ding***
[Both men just walk to the center of the ring and stare at one another. Inches from each other.]
Vance Knox: You think they are waiting for the bell to ring again?
Tilt: This is a masterful stare down Vance.
Vance Knox: Looks more like gay porn to me.
Tilt: Who is going to strike first? Remember the only way to win this match is to force your opponent to say I Quit.
[Both men suddenly erupt in a flurry of rights, both just throwing punches as hard and fast as they can. The crowd is eating it up, neither man can really get a clear cut advantage over the other. Jack Kross backs up and runs off the ropes hitting a shoulderblock into Killer who doesnt budge.]
Crowd: WHOA!!!!!
Tilt: Killer now bounces off the ropes and hits a shoulder block of his own, with Kross not giving any room.
Crowd: WHOA!!!!!!
Vance Knox: Both these guys are big, dumb, and couldnt wrestle themselves out of a paper bag. Next theyll
. Oh god, shoot me now.
Tilt: Whats so wrong with the Knuckle Lock?
Vance Knox: Cliché
killing me
cant
. escape.
[Both men try and force an advantage, but they are about equal
Killer starts to bend Jack Kross back, so Jack kicks Killers knee, and breaks the hold. He grabs a handful of mask and tries to smash Killers face into the cage, but Killer blocks it.]
Tilt: Killer almost tasting steel right there, but Jack Kross cant seal the deal.
Vance Knox: I dont want to know about Kross erectile dysfunction.
[Killer elbows out of it, and then sends Kross down to the mat with a stiff STO.]
Tilt: Kross head bounced off the mat like a tennis ball, Vance.
Vance Knox: And now Kross is getting to eat whatever Killer stepped in today.
[Bootscrapes against the bottom rope redden up Kross face. Killer pulls him up and whips him off the ropes and Kross comes flying back with a leaping clothesline that sends Killer back into the ropes, Kross catches him with a big boot on the rebound. He then turns and drops a standing moonsault that gets a good reaction from the crowd.]
Tilt: I cant tell what kind of style Kross fits into, he claims to be ground and pound, but then busts out standing moonsaults and has a triple jump moonsault in his arsenal.
Vance Knox: Thats what is known as FEU style.
Tilt: FEU?
Vance Knox: Fucks Everything Up.
[Kross grabs Killers legs and tries to flip him over for the Texas Clover Leaf, but Killer is fighting it not letting Kross flip him to his belly.]
Tilt: It looks like we might have our first submission applied, but Kross cant seem to get Killer over.
Vance Knox: He thought that series of quick moves might be enough, but Killer is still aware of the rules of this match and is fighting that Clover Leaf with all he has.
[Kross tries to roll Killer the other way quickly, but his grip on the standing Indian Deathlock slips and Killer kicks him off
]
Tilt: Kross has a lot of momentum!!!
[CLANG!!!!]
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Tilt: Kross just flew face first into the steel cage! Killer catches him with a massive released German Suplex that flips Kross over onto this belly.
Vance Knox: Kross is back up on his knees, but look at that puddle of blood pouring from his face.
Tilt: Well, this is going to get us banned from this arena, no doubt. They wouldnt let the King of the Deathmatch in the door, and we have Jack Kross bleeding all over the place.
Vance Knox: No kidding that man is a walking STD factory.
Tilt: Vance you dont know that.
Vance Knox: Have you seen his hygiene? He picks his nose with his tooth brush.
Tilt: That cant be true.
Vance Knox: Does anyone let you backstage?
Tilt: I have my own special place.
Vance Knox: And outside the alcove of the womens dressing room, do you see much of what goes on?
Tilt: No.
Vance Knox: Then dont argue with me.
[Killer still pulls back on the Camel Clutch while digging his fingers into the cut on Kross head. Blood pours down his face, and across Killers fingerless gloves.]
Ben Hernandez: What do you say Kross?
Jack Kross: FUCK OFF!!!!
[The Crowd buzzes with the expletive being echoed through the arena, and they start to boo.]
Jack Kross: FUCK YOU TOO!!!
Ben Hernandez: Well... thats unprofessional.
Tilt: Most guys would just moan incoherently.
Vance Knox: Thats the way Magnum TA played it. His I Quit matches where just AAGGGHH AAGGGHHHH AGGGHHHH!!
[Killer releases the Camel seeing that its going to take a little more than that, and pulls Kross up by his hair, and once again dumps him head over feet with a German suplex, he holds and rolls it.]
Tilt: Killer might try to get Kross to submit from a series of Rolling German suplexes.
Vance Knox: Or hes trying to break his neck. Either way, the match ends.
[Killer hits a third German, and then drags Kross over to a corner by his hair and starts to climb.]
Tilt: Where is Killer going?
Vance Knox: Who knows?
[Kross is forced to climb the cage as Killer has him by the hair, Killer reaches the top of the cage, but Kross finds his footing on top of the ropes and starts to fire shots to Killers ribs. Killer is forced to let go of Kross hair, and Kross grabs Killers legs and pulls him off the cage into a superbomb!!]
Crowd: HOLY CRAP!!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!!!
Vance Knox: Only in Utah do they clean up their swearing.
Tilt: So?
Vance Knox: It has the same meaning, why not just say the word? Its all semantics.
[Killer is folded over onto himself and Kross tries to wipe some of the blood out of his eyes, he smiles wickedly, and then locks on a modified STF.]
Tilt: THE SHITTER!!!
Vance Knox: See? Semantics.
Tilt: This modified Regal Stretch might be enough to get Killer to Quit, especially after that hellacious superbomb from the cage.
Ben Hernandez: Whats the word Killer?
Killer: GET OUTTA MY FACE WITH THAT!!! ARGGGHHHH!!
Vance Knox: The masked man is old skool. He Argghhed it.
Tilt: Killer slides his one free foot under the ropes forcing Ben Hernandez to call for a break.
[Kross refuses to let go of the hold, and Hernandez starts the five count. Kross lets go at 4 and half, when Hernandez gets on him about it he motions that he had something in his ear.]
Tilt: Killers neck and back have to be in a pickle after that stretch.
Vance Knox: Kross back on the advantage with a couple of kicks to the back of Killer as he tries to get to his feet
stay on that man, its the only way you can keep him down.
Tilt: Kross hits a quick legdrop and then rebounds off the ropes with a higher floating one to Killers back. He then sets Killer up on the top rope.
Vance Knox: Now hes climbing to the top.
[Kross is on the top of the Scaffold, and reaches down grabbing Killer by the eyeholes in his mask, forcing the Detroit native to climb up there with him. Kross slits his throat with his thumb and hooks Killer in a Standing headscissors.]
Tilt: Hes going for the Kross-A-Nation!!! If he hits it, Killer will be dead.
Vance Knox: Killer stands up!!! He blocked the Kross A Nation!!!
Tilt: Kross is trying to kick his way back to his feet, but Killer just whips him down with an Alabama Slamma ontop of the scaffolding!!! Kross is now hanging halfway off into the ring!
Vance Knox: Keep in mind at home that the cage is open over the top, that great opening that Jack Kross hangs nearly upside down over.
[Killer pulls Kross back onto the Scaffold, but hoists him up by the throat and drops him back down again with a Baldo Bomb.]
Tilt: Good thing these Scaffolds are reinforced by the other scaffolds on each edge, or this might topple over side ways.
Vance Knox: I hate you.
[Killer goes to German Suplex Kross on top of the Scaffold, but Jack floats behind him and spins him around into a quick snap DDT, that almost sends Killer onto the fans below.]
Tilt: We might have a major lawsuit on our hands. Killer is now halfway off the scaffold, but over the fans!!
Vance Knox: 310 pounds of human bomb onto these people isnt a pretty picture.
[Kross is trying to kick him off, but Killer has a firm hold on the mesh of the Scaffold.]
Tilt: Kross is now kicking at that arm he practically broke after their Iron Man match, I dont know if even Killers inhuman strength can survive this for long.
Vance Knox: Well, it seems that Kross has changed strategies and is looking for a submission on the back again with a Boston Crab.
Kross: ASK HIM MOTHERFUCKER!!!
Ben Hernandez: Im not climbing up there. Youll have to come down here.
[Kross leans way back on the Boston Crab, nearly into a bridge, but then lets go, pulling Killer up to a vertical base. He then hooks him for a suplex
]
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
[BAM!!!!!!! MONSTER HEEL HEAT!!!!]
Crowd: HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!! HOLY CRAP!!!
Tilt: Jack Kross just Superplexed Killer off the cage and down into the center of the ring!!!
Vance Knox: Both men are motionless.
Tilt: I dont know if either man could say I Quit at this point.
[Kross starts to move first, and drapes his arm over Killer
]
Ben Hernandez: You cant pin him Jack.
[Laughter from the crowd.]
Ben Hernandez: Oh you liked that well I got a joke for you
[Ben goes into telling his joke, but the power on the mic gets cut, so we cant hear what hes saying
until there is a little pop and sizzle of power.]
Ben Hernandez:
and then he says, No, you pick it up!!!
[Ben laughs at himself, but the crowd dies.]
Vance Knox: Good job Ben, kill any heat this match had.
[Jack Kross once again looks for the Texas Clover Leaf, and the crowd starts to get back in it urging Killer on.]
Ben Hernandez: You gonna quit Killer?
Killer: NAH!!!! GET THAT OUTTA MY FACE!!!
[The crowd roars at Killers response and yell louder to encourage him. Killer tries to power out of the Texas Clover Leaf, but Kross just turns Killer more to the center of the ring so he cant reach a rope and leans back on it more.]
Tilt: Killers back has taken some severe punishment especially after that superplex off the top of the cage.
[Killer once again balls his fists and tries to raise up, but Kross leans back and gets his footing again, to stop the comeback.]
Jack Kross: Ask him!!!
Ben Hernandez: You going to quit Killer?
Killer: I AINT QUITTIN GET OUTTA
.. MY
. FACE!!!!
[With the last word Killer pushes back with his legs and sends Jack once again face first into the steel cage, this time smacking his head on the double doors with the padlock on them. His head actually wedges in between the two doors.]
Crowd: ROCK-IES!!!! ROCK-IES!!!! ROCK-IES!!!! ROCK-IES!!!!
Tilt: Jack Kross head is stuck between the double doors of the cage!!! The chains gave way under the tremendous impact. I dont think he can get out.
[Killer staggers to his feet, and sees the predicament that Kross is in, and he steps on his back pushing him down over the second rope and is trying to pull the cage doors shut.]
Tilt: KILLER IS TRYING TO SHUT THE DOORS ON JACK KROSS NECK!!!
Vance Knox: His head will pop off like a dandylion.
Tilt: THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE!!!
[The crowd roars their approval while Kross tries to fight out of it. Pushing against the doors with all his strength, but he has a 300 pound man on his back and the doors are starting to close in on his neck more and more.]
Killer: GIVE UP JACK!!!!
Ben Hernandez: What do you say?
Jack Kross: NO!!!!!!!!
[Killer pulls on the doors more, but Jack manages to hold it off still.]
Killer: ASK!!!
Jack Kross: NO!!!!!!
[Killer jumps up and Bossman splashes Kross neck on the second rope, and then grabs the cage doors and vices Kross neck in between them. Kross arms are at his side, he cant defend himself.]
Killer: ASK!!!!
Ben Hernandez: What do you say Jack? Come on.
Jack Kross: I
.. I quit
[This Means War by Ozzy and Busta Rhymes blares out over the PA system as Killer backs off Jack Kross who drops limp over the ropes, and EMTs attend to him.]
Al Sharp: Winner of the match via surrender and winner of the best of five series, this is KILLER!!!!!!
Tilt: What a match!!! Jack Kross might have some serious injuries here.
Vance Knox: Yeah, lack of oxygen to the brain kills braincells, he might be stupider than he was before.
Tilt: Thats it for March to the Scaffold. Watch the big SWATiversary show where Killer will face Jace Mingla for the Hardway Championship.
Vance Knox: Later Wrestlenoids. |
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