Post by robriot on Oct 4, 2021 9:12:20 GMT -5
“They say it’s a mark of the respect that people have for you when they listen to your advice.”
Rob Riot is inside what can probably be called his “promo room.” Everything is darkness save for a wooden chair and a naked lightbulb directly above it. Riot isn’t sat in the chair, though - he paces around behind it, not looking at the camera. As he seemingly always is when he’s on his own, he’s dressed in his tweed jacket, corduroy trousers, and a white shirt.
Seriously, this man is almost single-handedly keeping tweed alive as an acceptable look in 2021.
“So I should thank you, Kid Koala, for the level of respect you’ve shown to me. The last time you heard me talk to a camera, I suggested that you and the rest of the gang get back in touch with your therapists. What do you do? You go straight to your therapist. Not only that, but you were kind enough to let us in on the session. Thank you for that, too. I found it most…revealing. What is this now? Are you playing Simon Says with me? Riot Says? If so, let’s see how many instructions you’re willing to take.”
Riot finally ends his pacing and sits down, leaning forward in his chair with his hands clasped in front of him.
"Riot says end the charade. Riot says drop the outfits and the pretences and come to the ring as a man, not an animal. Riot says accept the inevitable, lay down on your back, and let the greatest force in professional wrestling wash over you on the way to the top. How does that grab you as a game? Resisting us is pointless. Our victory is inevitable. You should know your place in the wrestling universe. After all, knowing your place in the universe seems to be very important to you."
He reaches up and absent-mindedly swats the lightbulb, sending it swinging from left to right and occasionally plunging himself into half-shadow as he speaks.
"The Big Bang, eh? The great scientific unknown. The origin point of all matter and energy. Matter and energy that dispersed across trillions of miles and became stars, and planets, and people. If you follow that theory along, eventually, that matter and energy became The Bastards and the Marsupials of Mayhem. It became Rob Riot and Kid Koala. You and I, Koala, are made of stars. That's what many scientists believe. Me, I don't know if it's true or not. What I do know, though, is that you're at the wrong end of the timeline. All that heat and light and energy - that was billions of years ago. Where's the universe now? You've covered the start, so allow me to cover the end."
He opens his hands up wide and then moves them wider apart, visually demonstrating the concept of expansion.
"The universe expands. Evolves. Changes and grows. Nothing can stop it. Nobody really understands how it happens. Eventually, though, it reaches terminal expansion. Everything is so far apart that nothing new can form. No more planets. No more stars. Cosmic entropy. The heat death of the universe. No light, no air, no people. Nothing. Can you imagine that, Kid Koala? Is your addled brain capable of imagining the concept of literal nothingness? Very few people can. It sends a shiver down their spine. We don't want to think about it because none of us likes to think about endings. That's why we shy away from death, and yet you want to take me there. You told your doctor that you want me to explode with you - to die with you, even. That's not how this works."
Abruptly, he brings his hands back together with a clap.
"You and I aren't headed for the big bang. That's long gone. If you want to go to the end with me, we're going to a place where nothing matters because nothing survives. We have to go to that entropy. Time extends, then stands still, then ceases to exist completely. To go to the end with me, you have to step away from that explosion in your mind - that bright light - and enter the darkness. You have to be willing to stand there in the dark and accept the inevitability of oblivion. To know that nothing you've ever done has consequence anymore because it's over. The marsupial act, the wrestling career, your hopes and dreams, everything you've ever thought, said or felt means nothing. That's where the end is. That's where the ride takes us, and you don't want to go there. You want to stay close to the light. You want to stay in the heat. You want to stay in the costumes because it's safe, and it's comfortable. To step away from that world - I think it scares you. So, I ask you one more time. In fact, I beg you. Don't do it. Don't try to push me into dragging you there. You're not going to like it."
His point mostly made, Riot stands again. He drags the chair away to some unseen corner of the room and then returns to the centre of the shot, standing next to the lightbulb.
"If you want to stay safe, I'll let you. We'll let you. If you want to spend your days in the light, you're more than welcome to. You don't have to suffer. You don't have to come face to face with the futility of existence. You can keep the act going, dream your dreams, smoke your cigarettes and feed on your non-existent teats. All you have to do - the only thing you have to do - is lose. Is that really too much of a price to pay for safety? But if you don't want to do that - if you want to come with me into the dark…"
He reaches out and yanks the bulb out of its socket, rendering himself invisible as the light disappears.
“...I’ll see you when you get here.”
Rob Riot is inside what can probably be called his “promo room.” Everything is darkness save for a wooden chair and a naked lightbulb directly above it. Riot isn’t sat in the chair, though - he paces around behind it, not looking at the camera. As he seemingly always is when he’s on his own, he’s dressed in his tweed jacket, corduroy trousers, and a white shirt.
Seriously, this man is almost single-handedly keeping tweed alive as an acceptable look in 2021.
“So I should thank you, Kid Koala, for the level of respect you’ve shown to me. The last time you heard me talk to a camera, I suggested that you and the rest of the gang get back in touch with your therapists. What do you do? You go straight to your therapist. Not only that, but you were kind enough to let us in on the session. Thank you for that, too. I found it most…revealing. What is this now? Are you playing Simon Says with me? Riot Says? If so, let’s see how many instructions you’re willing to take.”
Riot finally ends his pacing and sits down, leaning forward in his chair with his hands clasped in front of him.
"Riot says end the charade. Riot says drop the outfits and the pretences and come to the ring as a man, not an animal. Riot says accept the inevitable, lay down on your back, and let the greatest force in professional wrestling wash over you on the way to the top. How does that grab you as a game? Resisting us is pointless. Our victory is inevitable. You should know your place in the wrestling universe. After all, knowing your place in the universe seems to be very important to you."
He reaches up and absent-mindedly swats the lightbulb, sending it swinging from left to right and occasionally plunging himself into half-shadow as he speaks.
"The Big Bang, eh? The great scientific unknown. The origin point of all matter and energy. Matter and energy that dispersed across trillions of miles and became stars, and planets, and people. If you follow that theory along, eventually, that matter and energy became The Bastards and the Marsupials of Mayhem. It became Rob Riot and Kid Koala. You and I, Koala, are made of stars. That's what many scientists believe. Me, I don't know if it's true or not. What I do know, though, is that you're at the wrong end of the timeline. All that heat and light and energy - that was billions of years ago. Where's the universe now? You've covered the start, so allow me to cover the end."
He opens his hands up wide and then moves them wider apart, visually demonstrating the concept of expansion.
"The universe expands. Evolves. Changes and grows. Nothing can stop it. Nobody really understands how it happens. Eventually, though, it reaches terminal expansion. Everything is so far apart that nothing new can form. No more planets. No more stars. Cosmic entropy. The heat death of the universe. No light, no air, no people. Nothing. Can you imagine that, Kid Koala? Is your addled brain capable of imagining the concept of literal nothingness? Very few people can. It sends a shiver down their spine. We don't want to think about it because none of us likes to think about endings. That's why we shy away from death, and yet you want to take me there. You told your doctor that you want me to explode with you - to die with you, even. That's not how this works."
Abruptly, he brings his hands back together with a clap.
"You and I aren't headed for the big bang. That's long gone. If you want to go to the end with me, we're going to a place where nothing matters because nothing survives. We have to go to that entropy. Time extends, then stands still, then ceases to exist completely. To go to the end with me, you have to step away from that explosion in your mind - that bright light - and enter the darkness. You have to be willing to stand there in the dark and accept the inevitability of oblivion. To know that nothing you've ever done has consequence anymore because it's over. The marsupial act, the wrestling career, your hopes and dreams, everything you've ever thought, said or felt means nothing. That's where the end is. That's where the ride takes us, and you don't want to go there. You want to stay close to the light. You want to stay in the heat. You want to stay in the costumes because it's safe, and it's comfortable. To step away from that world - I think it scares you. So, I ask you one more time. In fact, I beg you. Don't do it. Don't try to push me into dragging you there. You're not going to like it."
His point mostly made, Riot stands again. He drags the chair away to some unseen corner of the room and then returns to the centre of the shot, standing next to the lightbulb.
"If you want to stay safe, I'll let you. We'll let you. If you want to spend your days in the light, you're more than welcome to. You don't have to suffer. You don't have to come face to face with the futility of existence. You can keep the act going, dream your dreams, smoke your cigarettes and feed on your non-existent teats. All you have to do - the only thing you have to do - is lose. Is that really too much of a price to pay for safety? But if you don't want to do that - if you want to come with me into the dark…"
He reaches out and yanks the bulb out of its socket, rendering himself invisible as the light disappears.
“...I’ll see you when you get here.”
