Post by Frank Windsor on Dec 16, 2021 17:58:08 GMT -5
THE NAME OF THE BADMAN!!!
The camera panned up and focused on a chair. It was in the Bastards locker room ready for Rob Riot’s shot at immortality. Sat upon the chair was none other than the King of Yorkshire himself, Frank Windsor. He had one of the Imperial Crown tag championship belts over his left shoulder. He nodded as if he had answered a question inside his head.
“So were you expecting someone else?” Frank asked sarcastically. “I may have lost my beard and worked off my lockdown pounds but if you’re waiting to see Santa fucking Claus you may want to go and find Robbie beating him off……Wait, what? Freudian slip there; Robbie has been seen beating Santa up in his training sessions to bring that CWA belt thing back to the Bastards. I know you’re all expecting me to say something about it being a fluke that he got past me but I won’t lower the tone of this place by dignifying that especially as I may have thrown the old man a bone but with his addictions to cheap beer and pornhub he needs that belt more than I but of course that’s our little secret right?”
Frank nodded as he looked deep into the camera.
“You know the Bastards could not be here for our boy right?” Frank asked. “He’s going to be bringing that belt home to the Bastards but if any of the others in this tourney or their friends think that they can throw some shenanigans in Robbie’s face then the Bastards will be there to kick their fucking teeth down their goddamn throat. For we all know what the fucking outcome is already don’t we you fucking muppets? Do we not?”
He rubbed his beard as he continued.
“Anyway that’s in the past as we all know Robbie’s gonna beat the rest of those guys left in the tournament and bring that gold strap back to the Bastards,” he smirked slightly. “Talking about gold straps the Bastards defend our Imperial Crown Tag Championship belts on the last Honour of the year against the former tag champions in Halifax, Nova Scotia. The Dork Stars? I’d forgotten those two were still active in the locker room after myself and Robbie embarrassed them and I’m not saying embarrassed by posting weird pictures on the internet as those two have done enough of that themselves over the years.”
Frank took the tag belt off of his shoulder and started to caress it before he looked back into the lens of the camera.
“Kono and Niko,” he chuckled. “Do you want me to be serious about you guys trying to get the straps back from the Bastards? I remember when me and Robbie took those belts off of you two when we ripped the fuck out of you with some Simpsons BS stuff. Now that was fun fucking times but that was before we were took fucking serious in this promotion. You see we’re multi-time tag champions, hell you could call the Bastards tag specialist as we’ve won them in every promotion we’ve been a part of BUT we’re more than that as we all big time champions where ever we go and now that I’m here in NPW it’s time to be put on our serious fucking hats.”
He put the belt back over his shoulder and continued his rant of sorts.
“I could have entered myself into this battle royale type thingy they’ve got going on the same night but I don’t want to overdo it on the show as the Bastards are main fucking event as usual already. Anyway I digress, this time Billy gets to stand alongside me as we defend our belts against the Dork Stars and I’m hoping it’s not going to be like the time Billy and I defended our RSW Tag Championship belts against Eddie Havok and Erebus aka the Koresh Family. Now that was a weird fucking match which ended with Billy getting pinned and losing us those gold straps but this time it’s going to be fucking different. I know doubt fucking leads to lack of faith but I can see it’ll be fucking different this time, right Billy?”
He paused for dramatic effect before a smirked crossed his face for a split second.
“Yes, that is the same fucking Eddie Havok that I beat in the CWA tournament easily,” he nodded. “And revenge was sweet when I knocked him out of the tournament before going on to face Robbie but this isn’t just some fucking vanity project for the Bastards are we’re a proven addition to this promotion and all of us will be singles champions sometime next year in this company, even Fowler. But this ain’t about trying to be the best singles champions; no, this is about OUR tag championship belts and no wankers are going to get their grubby little hands on them even if they are a couple of fucking aliens from the fucking Simpsons, so they can go and eat my shorts dude!”
Frank laughed before he stopped and straightened his face once again.
“We may be classed as the greatest trio in the wrestling industry but there are always some piss-poor imitators that think they can ride our coattails to fucking greatness,” Frank said. “Where are all those groups that were here when we started in this promotion? We belittled them and they have either headed for the fucking hills or become fucking mere shadows of their former fucking selves whilst the Bastards have risen to the top of the pack. Us wrestlers of fucking renown will show the rest of the fucking world what it’s like to be the fucking franchise and carry this company on our fucking shoulders. There is only one fucking thing you can do and that’s put on the seat belt as this is going to be the fucking ride of your life and that my friends is all there is to say about it so mic fucking drop.”
“So were you expecting someone else?” Frank asked sarcastically. “I may have lost my beard and worked off my lockdown pounds but if you’re waiting to see Santa fucking Claus you may want to go and find Robbie beating him off……Wait, what? Freudian slip there; Robbie has been seen beating Santa up in his training sessions to bring that CWA belt thing back to the Bastards. I know you’re all expecting me to say something about it being a fluke that he got past me but I won’t lower the tone of this place by dignifying that especially as I may have thrown the old man a bone but with his addictions to cheap beer and pornhub he needs that belt more than I but of course that’s our little secret right?”
Frank nodded as he looked deep into the camera.
“You know the Bastards could not be here for our boy right?” Frank asked. “He’s going to be bringing that belt home to the Bastards but if any of the others in this tourney or their friends think that they can throw some shenanigans in Robbie’s face then the Bastards will be there to kick their fucking teeth down their goddamn throat. For we all know what the fucking outcome is already don’t we you fucking muppets? Do we not?”
He rubbed his beard as he continued.
“Anyway that’s in the past as we all know Robbie’s gonna beat the rest of those guys left in the tournament and bring that gold strap back to the Bastards,” he smirked slightly. “Talking about gold straps the Bastards defend our Imperial Crown Tag Championship belts on the last Honour of the year against the former tag champions in Halifax, Nova Scotia. The Dork Stars? I’d forgotten those two were still active in the locker room after myself and Robbie embarrassed them and I’m not saying embarrassed by posting weird pictures on the internet as those two have done enough of that themselves over the years.”
Frank took the tag belt off of his shoulder and started to caress it before he looked back into the lens of the camera.
“Kono and Niko,” he chuckled. “Do you want me to be serious about you guys trying to get the straps back from the Bastards? I remember when me and Robbie took those belts off of you two when we ripped the fuck out of you with some Simpsons BS stuff. Now that was fun fucking times but that was before we were took fucking serious in this promotion. You see we’re multi-time tag champions, hell you could call the Bastards tag specialist as we’ve won them in every promotion we’ve been a part of BUT we’re more than that as we all big time champions where ever we go and now that I’m here in NPW it’s time to be put on our serious fucking hats.”
He put the belt back over his shoulder and continued his rant of sorts.
“I could have entered myself into this battle royale type thingy they’ve got going on the same night but I don’t want to overdo it on the show as the Bastards are main fucking event as usual already. Anyway I digress, this time Billy gets to stand alongside me as we defend our belts against the Dork Stars and I’m hoping it’s not going to be like the time Billy and I defended our RSW Tag Championship belts against Eddie Havok and Erebus aka the Koresh Family. Now that was a weird fucking match which ended with Billy getting pinned and losing us those gold straps but this time it’s going to be fucking different. I know doubt fucking leads to lack of faith but I can see it’ll be fucking different this time, right Billy?”
He paused for dramatic effect before a smirked crossed his face for a split second.
“Yes, that is the same fucking Eddie Havok that I beat in the CWA tournament easily,” he nodded. “And revenge was sweet when I knocked him out of the tournament before going on to face Robbie but this isn’t just some fucking vanity project for the Bastards are we’re a proven addition to this promotion and all of us will be singles champions sometime next year in this company, even Fowler. But this ain’t about trying to be the best singles champions; no, this is about OUR tag championship belts and no wankers are going to get their grubby little hands on them even if they are a couple of fucking aliens from the fucking Simpsons, so they can go and eat my shorts dude!”
Frank laughed before he stopped and straightened his face once again.
“We may be classed as the greatest trio in the wrestling industry but there are always some piss-poor imitators that think they can ride our coattails to fucking greatness,” Frank said. “Where are all those groups that were here when we started in this promotion? We belittled them and they have either headed for the fucking hills or become fucking mere shadows of their former fucking selves whilst the Bastards have risen to the top of the pack. Us wrestlers of fucking renown will show the rest of the fucking world what it’s like to be the fucking franchise and carry this company on our fucking shoulders. There is only one fucking thing you can do and that’s put on the seat belt as this is going to be the fucking ride of your life and that my friends is all there is to say about it so mic fucking drop.”
